fifty shades of gay.

evan takes over to rant about something important

Alright, I'm handing this to Evan. He's the one in bold.

Even though I'm not bold, lmao.

Same, my guy. Good luck.

Thanks.

So, I'm gonna tag everyone that knows me that I want to see reading this.

So, Alex (fierrochase), Blue (universallyblue), Cat (itsfangirlcat), Kristen (Kanata-), DC (@dcuniverse-), Grace (avifauna), Chilea, Rylee (spacefryy), Charlie (-starboyy) and Blair (-somerandomdemigod).

I dunno why DC doesn't show up the same but I'll just tag them later.

Alright, the reason why I tagged you guys is because I want to just come out and say the truth.

Now anyone who knows me well enough knows that I can be considered suicidal. I've attempted to die about four times, the most recent attempt... I almost succeeded.

I'm not lying, I tried to drown and I blacked out from lack of air. And I almost died.

There's something I've never mentioned.

Some of you guys know that I can see... Things. Other things.

I have a gift that I inherited from my dad, the gift​of seeing the spirit world.

But I see the shadows more. Real, actual shadows talk to me and reach out to touch me.

They're very touchy.

I think Lilith is getting restless from me talking about this but I need to keep going.

And for those of you who don't know who Lilith is, she's the shadow in my house.

The one my dad trapped in the studio.

And causing me insomnia.

Anyway.

Yeah, I can talk to shadows and see them and sense them and hear them and I can hear ghosts and sense them.

But the difference between them is one, I can't see ghosts. Spirits and shit, I can't see them.

Shadows, I can.

Two, shadows are not exactly human. They don't have human souls. I guess you could say I see demons, I dunno.

Either way, not many shadows are happy that I can control them to some extent.

What does this have to do with suicide?

Well, when I attempted my most recent episode I saw one.

I could feel my soul escaping my body and the first thing I saw was a shadow.

He looked like Anubis, to be honest, but he wasn't. He did have a dog head though. He was kinda werewolf like.

He said that I couldn't leave. And that if I tried, terrible things would happen. He was giving me a chance to go back and live.

But at the same time, I could've taken the chance to run away and die.

But, I'm not shitting with you guys here okay.