Since You Left | Joe Sugg x Reader

Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Hanging out with Joe has become extremely awkward, our conversations just don't flow the way they used to, we can never make perfect eye contact, he always seems off and I can imagine I do too. All I wish is that it could go back to how it was. As much as I'd want to be back with him too, I wouldn't mind just being able to hang out without an awkward tension clinging onto the air.

"Your video was cool, it made me laugh." Joe smiles, we're simply walking around today, both of us probably hoping that we'd be fine but like always it stays the same.

"Thank you. Your new dare Sugg video was funny too." I mention, remembering he uploaded recently as well. I've gotten into this habit of watching old videos of us or just watching any of his videos recently. It's like my way of being with him casually where it's not the way it is like usual. In his videos, he's calm and relaxed, the way he used to be with me and I guess I just watch them for a taste of the old times when we were together and everything was fine. The thing I miss most is just talking to him, just being able to talk about anything; whether it be a problem or something that casually happened. No matter what, he'd be interested. I miss waking up to him as well, his arms wrapped around my tightly and his morning frown with his hair in a complete mess. I also miss how he'd make any situation happy, cracking a joke which would never fail at making me laugh even if it was a completely inappropriate time. I just miss him. Sometimes I think about telling him all of that but always end up chickening out. I know he'd understand, I'm not sure if he'd feel the same but he'd understand and that's another thing I miss. His understanding.

Joe and I ended up going home shortly after that, an awkward goodbye parting us. But I didn't go home, instead, I went to Oli's place and stayed the night. Something feels weird about me staying the night at his even though I slept on his couch.

"Morning." Oli smiles, coming into the room already dressed and showered. Honestly, how can he be up so early?

"Up this early?" I groan, sitting up and rubbing my eyes.

"Yeah, I have loads of meetings today." He tells me, beginning to make himself a drink. "Want one?"

"Please." I smile, groggily walking over to him. Surprisingly, since the kiss it's not been awkward between Oli and I. It's as if it never happened which I'm not sure is a good thing or not. Shouldn't first kisses be memorable? Should it be forgotten that easily? I don't know what to think, I question whether it may be the fact that we're both close to Joe or maybe our connection wasn't as strong as I thought. Or perhaps it's because I'm still in love with Joe. An hour passes and Oli's off on his meetings and I'm back home going through my emails. One's actually about a YouTube party in a week which seems to be the only email worth getting excited about. The rest are simply work related, and not the fun side of my job, just confirming things or giving my opinion on something. Soon after I've opened the email, I get a call from Zoe which I answer happily. Someone to talk to that isn't involved in my love life! I feel like my life has revolved around only Oli and Joe lately.

"Hey, you got the email about the party?" Zoe asks with an excited tone.

"Yeah, I just read it."

"Are you going to go?"

"Of course." I giggle, I wouldn't miss a party. Shockingly, I have become a big fan of going out recently.

"I'll come with you then if that's okay because Alfie can't go."

"Perfect." I smile, I wouldn't have anyone to go with either if I'm honest. However, it would have been Joe a few months ago.

But I not longer have him.