Sanders Sides OneShots

Intrusive (Prinxiety)

I wrote this because I wanted to vent write about my Intrusive thoughts. I decided to mainly focus on the intrusive thoughts I get centring on others instead of those centring on myself (which are way more extreme) so some violence and murder is definitely implied. I just wanted to take the time to say that if you get Intrusive thoughts too, it doesn't make you a bad person unless you act on them; actions speak louder than words after all. Anyway, I've never written anything really centred on Prince before so this was pretty fun, he's probably awfully written though because I have hardly any experience on writing him. Also, this was meant to just be angsty but it turned out fluffy oops. So beware for that since I'm absolutely terrible at fluff. Feedback is always appreciated 💝

Trigger Warnings: Violence mention, Murder mention, Angst (kind of), Very slightly nsfw, Intrusive Thoughts, Ask if you need anything tagged

They're always there, really, in the back of his mind. Just, sometimes they're... amplified.

"Hey, Ro, would you mind putting this knife in the drawer behind you? Thanks!" After handing the knife to Prince, Morality turned back to whatever he was doing.

Prince wasn't really paying attention to that though, he was busy with his thoughts, his eyes darting between the object in his hands and Morality's back.

'He's completely defenceless... He wouldn't see it coming... You could just stab him right now.... Over and over and over and he wouldn't be able to even fight back...'

No. No he can't do that. He can't. Morality is his friend, he would never hurt him, he hasn't done anything to wrong him.

Prince tore his eyes away from the knife, spinning around and yanking the drawer open. He practically threw the knife into it and slammed it shut before quickly leaving the kitchen, not seeing the concerned look Morality gave him.

"Hello, Roman, it's a nice day, isn't it?"

Prince jumped at the sound of Logic's voice, he hadn't heard him approaching. He looked up from his spot on the balcony he was sitting on, overlooking the surrounding area of Thomas' mindscape that he had conjured up. There was no railing, he wasn't scared of falling.

"Good afternoon, Logan, it is a nice day indeed!" He grinned before turning his eyes back to the view.

"Yes, Roman, there's something I need to ask you." Logic sat down beside Prince, looking out over the view as he spoke, unaware of the other's inner conflict.

'He isn't even looking at you, you could hurt him so badly... You could kill him... All it takes is a little push...'

"Roman, are you listening?" Logic's words snapped the Royal out of his thoughts. Prince cleared his throat, laughing nervously.

"Aha... No, sorry, could you repeat that?" If Logic noticed the other scooting a bit away as he spoke, putting distance between them, he didn't say anything.

Gentle touches, fingers running through hair, grasping, tugging, lips moving in sync, hands coming up to cradle cheeks–

'You could snap his neck right now with one yank...'

Hands being pulled back as if burnt, fingers leaving hair, confused eyes.

"Princey, are you alright? What's wrong?" Anxiety was flushed, his hoodie hanging off one shoulder, his eyeshadow smudged, lips bruised from bites–

'You could have bitten his lips right off and he wouldn't have been able to stop it...'

Prince hadn't realised he had let out a yell of frustration at his own thoughts until he saw Anxiety jump.

"I... Sorry." Prince sighed, running a hand through his hair, messing it up more than it already was.

Anxiety leaned forward, placing a hand on the other Side's hand "Hey, c'mon, talk to me, Princey. What's wrong?" His voice was soft, worry evident in his tone.

Prince chuckled bitterly, shaking his head "You wouldn't want to know..." His eyes began to sting and he nearly scoffed at his tears. Princes weren't supposed to cry, although he was already a pretty lousy prince if his thoughts were anything to go by...

"If its bad enough to make you cry then I definitely want to know, Princey. C'mon, tell me. Please?" What had started out as a firm tone soon changed to that same worried tone that had been present mere moments ago.

"It's.. It's like.. I.. l," Prince struggled to find words to describe what he was experiencing before he decided that the best way to say was the bluntest way to possibly say it "I think things I shouldn't think. Bad things."

Anxiety blinked "Okay.. What kind of bad things, Princey? You're gonna have to be a bit more specific for me."

"I think of... hurting people. I would never actually do it!" Prince rushed to try and explain "The thoughts just come whenever it's like, possible that I could hurt people... like when they're at a ledge or something....But I swear I wouldn't actually do it, Anx, I swear!"

Tears were welling up again but Prince didn't care. Not this time. Anxiety probably hates him now, he thinks he's dangerous, that he's sick.

"Hey, hey, it's okay. It's alright, it's okay." Anxiety wrapped his arms around the other who was starting to shake, burying his head in his chest.

Prince buried his nose in Anxiety's hair, hugging the smaller to his chest so tightly he was worried he would hurt the other but if Anxiety was in pain he didn't say so. He laughed bitterly, the sound muffled slightly by Anxiety's hair.

"I'm such an awful excuse for a prince," He choked out, his throat hurting from the desperate sobs that now wracked his frame, Anxiety's shushes and words of comfort the only other sound in the room. He would most definitely feel embarrassed about this breakdown later but right now it just felt so good to finally let it all out after so long.

Anxiety pulled out of the hug, ignoring Prince's whine of protest. His eyes no longer held the softness they previously did, now they were stern.

"Don't you ever say that again, Roman. Those thoughts do not make you a bad person, they don't define you." His voice held a form of finality that almost had Prince believing him, almost.

Prince took in a shaky breath, his throat aching from the crying he had done, the tears on his face pulling at his skin uncomfortably as the tracks dried, his nose felt stuffy and runny at the same time and it stung slightly.

"A prince's role is to protect those around him, yet I constantly think of hurting those around me, that's the exact opposite of what a prince is supposed to do, Fairest..." He wiped at his cheeks in an effort to relieve some of the discomfort as he spoke, his voice scratchy as he avoided eye contact from his lover.

Anxiety let out what sounded to be a sigh exasperation before ducking to meet Prince's gaze, his hair falling slightly in front of his eyes and Prince resisted the urge to brush it out of his face, to run his hand gently down the pale cheek of the boy in front of him.

"Roman, have ever acted on those thoughts before?" He questioned, Prince cast his eyes downwards again as he shook his head. Fingers gently took ahold of his chin and tilted his head upwards. Anxiety's soft brown eyes met his, his mouth quirked in a smile as he pulled the other in for a sweet, chaste kiss and though it only lasted for a few seconds, to Prince it felt as though time had frozen completely, only restarting when Anxiety pulled back.

"I don't know about you, but I think actions speak louder than words" He smiled at Prince and Prince found himself smiling back because though it wasn't a long winded, romantic explanation of why his thoughts don't define him, it was filled with sincerity and love and most important of all it came from Anxiety.

And that was enough

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So right now I have a lot of oneshots already written and on my tumblr (destroyed-conscience) but I've been wanting to publish them on here for a while so I'm finally doing it. I'm thinking of maybe releasing one every day for now? Because I have a ton of them. Either way, hope you enjoyed this and enjoy the next few to come!