My Dearest, Laurens

J. Laurens

I sat in bed the next morning and just stared at the bed, feeling numb. I had no idea how to feel. I didn't exactly regret it, but I didn't feel great about it either. I loved Alexander so much but I couldn't help wondering if maybe we moved a bit fast. I also couldn't help hearing the voice in my head telling me that he found me disgusting and that he hated my body.

It had been so nice the night before feeling truly loved but all that love had gone away and all I could feel was emptiness.

I felt Alexander stir beside me before he sat up a bit and smiled at me. I tried to give a small smile back at him but it didn't really work. He raised an eyebrow at me.

"John, what's wrong?" He asked me.

I shook my head and said "Just tired."

"Well, I have the best way to wake you up a bit more." He smiled at me.

"What is it?" I asked nervously, scared he was talking about more of what we had the night before.

He smiled and jumped on me, kissing all over my face and making little "mwah" sounds with each kiss. I couldn't help but giggle.

He rolled off the bed and landed on his feet before running out of the room like a kid pretending to be an airplane. I smiled and followed him into the living room.

"What made you so happy today?" I asked.

"Why, you, of course!" He said and ran over to me, picking me up.

I giggled and realized there was no way I regretted it. Alexander just made me so happy.

"Hey, Alex?" I said.

"Yes, my love?" He asked.

"We should probably put some clothes on. I invited Laf and Herc over today." I told him.

He kissed my chin and carried me into our room and setting me on the bed. I threw on a large sweater and some pants that Hercules had made me. They were pretty hot. They made my ass look great.

We went back into the living room and turned on some music before sitting on the couch. I started humming along to the song and I laid my head on Alexander's shoulder and he laid his head on mine and set his hand on my knee. I couldn't believe how happy I was; this is what real couples did! I, John Laurens, awkward, shy John Laurens was in an actual relationship.

I was completely caught up in the moment until the next song came on.

"Omg, Alex." I said "This is my favorite song!"

"Really? Freeze Your Brain from Heathers?" He asked me.

"Yea. I can just... kind of relate to it. Obviously not the 7/11 part but, just he constant moving and horrible dad part." I sighed.

"Why did you move around a lot?" He asked.

I breathed in hard and said "Okay, I'll tell you, but you have to promise not to tell anyone, ever."

"I promise." He said.

"So, my dad was part of a huge... sex slave trading company. He told me that sex slave trading was horrible, but he was doing it himself! What a fucking hypocrite. But, because of the trading having to be very hush-hush he had to travel to wherever the slaves were needed and so, I would have to change schools each time he got a new client." I told him.

"Oh my gosh, John, that's... that's just horrible. I'm very rarely at a loss for words but right now, I really am." He scooted over and put his arm around me.

Just then, there was a knock at the door and I got up to get it.

I opened the door to see Laf and Herc standing there smiling. Laf burst out laughing when they came in.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

"Mon ami, mon petit frére, mon beau John, how is your ass feeling today? Est-ce qu'il fait mal plus ou moins qu'il faisait hier?" He asked.

I then came to the sudden realization that the walls and roof of that dorm were very thin. I looked over at Alexander.

The only thing he said was "Nous sommes brisés"

"Litéralement et sens figuré" Laf chimed in.

"Don't worry, I'm sure no one knew it was you." Hercules tried to comfort us.

I thought about how mad Alexander must have been at me.