Jiley Alphabet Oneshots - Book Two

D-Depression

James pov:
  Riley had been struggling. She had lost all her motivation to do anything. The doctors had out her on anxiety medication with suspected depression in conversation. She was not the same.

    The previous months had been hard. Riley had been self harming, had been so down, had little interest in anything in her life. I got so worried about her that I would go over every night to make sure was safe:to make sure she didn't get into any harm. The cuts luckily weren't too severe but I was terrified of what might happen if they got any deeper.

    I didn't want people to think I was selfish, but it was hard on me, too. Seeing the person you love in so much pain, it hurts: Riley meant everything to me, and the possibility I could lose her, it was a lot to bare.

     I went over one night and she was on her bed, staring at the ceiling passively. Her eyes looked frozen, like there was no emotion left in her.

   "Hi, Riles" I said softly. "It's me, James. Can you sit up?"

    I watched as she gently shook her head.

    "Well do I need to get a doctor? I can if you want."

    I sat on the end of the bed and she kicked my thigh. I knew she wanted to be alone, but I didn't want to leave her like this. Suddenly, luckily, Emily came in.

   "Ri, come on, up you get" she said as she tugged at Riley's arms. She got her sat up, although the expression was still the same.

    "You've got to talk, please. We are all so worried about you."

     "Hi." Riley whispered.

         I decided Riley needed to get out of the house, even if she didn't want to.

   "Stand up." I said."Come on Riley, please."

    Sighing, she pushed against the bed and stood up.

     "Come on, we are going out." I told her.

    "Do we have to?" She moaned.

   "Yes we do. Emily please helped her get dressed, I don't think Riley particularly wants me to see her undressed!" I chuckled.

    I could see Riley lift a little bit. She needed this as much as I needed her to do this.

Riley pov:
   James came over and said he wanted to take me out. I didn't understand why he put up with me. I was worthless, I wasn't worthy of his love. I got up and Emily helped me put some clothes on, after lying in bed in my dressing gown all morning. I probably stank, cause I always was ugly and I didn't get how anyone put up with me.

    After getting up, Emily made me some breakfast, oatmeal with blueberries. It made my stomach churn to see the food, I hadn't eaten all day and according to the doctors, depression can mean you loose your appetite. Mom was convinced I had an eating disorder on top of the depression because I was barely eating,  but it was because I lacked motivation to get out of bed each dsy; to continue with life.

    I knew my family, and James ( who I considered as family anyway), were trying their hardest with me, but I hated being that burden.

James pov:
 
     When Riley came outside, it made a beaming smile spread across my face. The food Emily had made obviously had helped to perk her up a bit.

   The first trip I decided to make with her was to the doctors office. She had refused to take the medication because she kept refusing the help. She needed professional help, and I was going to make sure she got it.

   When we arrived at the doctors, Her face dropped. It made me feel slightly guilty but I knew in my heart I was doing the best thing for her.

     We went in, after me physically pulling her out of the car, and I registered her in. She moaned like a child having a tantrum in a toy store. I swear depression made her maturity level drop but about 5 years.

   The doctor called Riley in and I went in with her to make sure she didn't refuse the help again.

    I told the Doctor about her symptoms as I had taken note every time I'd seen her. He said this definately called for some medication, although, thankfully,  we could give her a small dose with little to no side effects. Riley seemed to realise what we were all saying was right- she needed this to make her better. We took the prescription and we're sent on our way.

    Riley took the medication in the car, I put the radio on to distract her whirring mind.

   "James, thankyou for what you've done. " She said "I don't know what I'd do without you."

   When she said that it brought a tear to my eye. It was the first time in a while she properly spoken, and it was amazing to hear her beautiful voice once again.

     Next I was taking her somewhere that I knew would help bring back memories, that would help her recover, even if only a tiny bit, the effort would be worth it.

Riley pov:
    
    James pulled up at the beach. There, sat on the golden sand, was a table, two chairs, fairy lights and a boom box.  It looked magical and almost made me forget about my troubles for a moment.

    "James, this is stunning." I stuttered in disbelief.

    "You like it?"He asked hopefully.

    "Of course, it is amazing." I replied.

   "Just like you." He whispered in my ears softly. It made my skin tingle, my heart flutter in delight. It was a sensation I hadn't felt in a long time. Were the drugs working that quickly? Or was James the thing I needed to get me out of the deep ditch I was in?

      James took my hand and led my over to the beach. I took off my sandals and sunk my feet into the sand, feeling the warmth on my toes. We sat on the chairs and breathed in the crisp sea air, listening to the waves splashing onto the shore.

       James lifted up a picnic basket. It was exactly how one of our dates had been like before, although it was my idea the first time round. It was special,  it was perfect.

   After eating our feast (which tasted so good after not letting myself eat for ages), James asked if I wanted to dance. He turned on the boom box and we slow danced on the sand to our song 'we go'

   James always knew what to do, and I was so lucky to have him in my life. No matter where this roller coaster may take me, I know he'll always be there to keep it in control, to keep me safe, to make me happy.

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