Blue

A Step Forward

BEFORE YOU READ THIS CHAPTER, I HAVE TO WARN YOU THAT IT IS UTTERLY HORRIBLE AND CRAPPY AND DOESNT HAVE VERY GOOD ENGRISH. So please if you are gonna read it keep in mind that its horrible and will be better soon, mmkay?

I was worried.

Stressed, even. There's a little voice in my head that kept repeating the same words over and over. You're going to die.

In no sense was it litteral, of course. I was, as I had said, worried and my mind was exaggerating everything and anything it could get its' metaphorical hands onto. But I'm worried for one reason.

The initiation.

Oh God, who even says that word anymore. It's so cheesy.

There's movement at the door but I barely pay attention. I'm too busy dwelling over my thoughts. I only come back to reality when I realize Stacy takes a seat beside me. I give her a sidelong glance, my eyes taking in her figure. She's so pretty. Her hair was completely straight and long, although not as long as Emily's, her brunette locks just long enough to brush along her arms. She had these bright blue eyes framed with long thick black eyelashes and pouty lips. And I sighed, one that signified how ugly I felt in comparison to her.

Do I say hi? She doesn't acknowledge me which, strangely enough, I would expect her too, seeing as we had spent an entire lunch and exchanged a few words together. But no, I doubt she would stoop down the social ladder just to talk to me.

Don't talk so fast. Your social status hasn't been deemed as of yet.

It won't be long until it is.

It's quiet for what feels like an hour and on my behalf I feel the tension rise. I say it like this because she's cool, calm and composed, and her hands don't tremble beneath the table like mine do.

That's because she has no reason too.

My thoughts are beginning to scatter and a nervous sweat builds like a second layer of skin. Don't be nervous. Act natural. Keep your hands still. Stop sweating or you'll have a wet patch on your back. Look forward, don't dart your eyes. Repeat.

My thoughts disappear as one person walks through the door.

Like a burst of sunshine through a storm, Tyler appears. My thoughts and feelings calm as I register his friendly smile, and those honest green eyes. I suddenly have the urge to smile myself, but instead I keep my eyes downcast. From the corner of my eye, I see Stacy look at me, her eyes curious, but before I could note anything serious she turns away.

"Hi." My heart thumps in my chest at the sound of his voice. I don't bother to see if he was speaking to me, because I'm sure he would be talking to someone more like Stacy. Beautiful, pretty and gorgeous.

He gave you his number.

He's probably forgotten already.

You don't give your number out to just anyone.

I didn't argue with that one. It was a valid point. I didn't have enough time to question the confident voice that had piqued up so suddenly because a voice had responded to his greeting, crushing the ounce of hope. 

"Hey," Stacy says, and from the corner of my eye I see her smile sweetly. My insides clench and I frown at the desk. Are you kidding? He gives you his number and now you're in love with him. Get over yourself, he talked to you for three minutes out of pity.

I pinched my lip with my teeth, but didn't glance up. I was just being stupid. He doesn't remember me from yesterday and I told myself, I didn't care. So with my heart sunken to my toes, I only look up when the teacher walks through the door with a great shuffle and commotion at the door.