P R E S E N T
THIRD PERSON's POV
"Bwisit, nakakahilo maglinis ayoko na!" Napaupo si Wonwoo sa sahig habang nakabusangot at hilong-hilo.
Kanina pa siya bumabahing sa mga alikabok na pumapasok sa ilong niya. Kanina pa siya yuko nang yuko para pulutin ang kung anumang kailangan linisan na nasa sahig. Kanina pa siya tupi nang tupi ng mga damit.
Sa sobrang dami niyang ginagawa, nahilo na siya. Parang pinupukpok ng ilang milyong martilyo ang ulo niya. Konting galaw niya lang kikirot na ng matindi ang ulo niya. Konting galaw lang ng mata niya pakiramdam niya mahihimatay siya at mandidilim ang kanyang paningin.
He exhaustedly closed his eyes with a very deep sigh. He swallowed the lump forming on his throat. He can feel his eyes started to sting, his tears threatening to fall.
For the past three years, everything he does seems to be so exhausting and hard for him. Parang lahat nalang ng gagawin niya sobrang nakakapagod kahit kakasimula niya pa lang sa dapat na gawain. He can't find any joy in everything he do.
Ilang minuto muna siyang nakaupo sa sahig habang hinihintay mawala ang hilo na nararamdaman sa kanyang ulo. Noong nahimasmasan na siya, tinuloy na niya ulit ang paglilinis. Konting tapon lang ng mga gamit at pagwawalis nalang naman ang kailangan para matapos ito.
Habang naglilinis si Wonwoo ng study table niya, napansin niya ang isang notebook na may blue leather cover. Bumilis naman ang tibok ng puso niya noong maalala niyang iyon ang pinagsusulatan niya ng mga hinanakit tungkol sa panahong sila pa ni Mingyu.
For the nth time, he heavily breathed again. Lahat ng bawat sulok ng kwarto niya, naalala niya si Mingyu—isang dahilan kung bakit hindi pa rin siya nakaka-move on kay Mingyu.
Everything still feels like a fresh wound to him. Everything is still so vivid, everything just feels like. . . it happened yesterday. And Wonwoo keeps on torturing and abusing his own self by feeding his mind with lots of memories that happened to him and Mingyu. Even though being with him was like an emotional torture for him.
He swore to everyone that he'll never pick up that notebook again. He swore to himself that he'll never read every painful word he had written on that notebook.
He swore to himself, to everyone—that he'll never stain that notebook with his own tears again.
He tried to stop himself, but his stubborn self prevented him to.
He picked up the notebook again, and he held it tightly on his hand. Slowly and gently, he put the notebook against his chest and hugged it tightly.
With tears falling on his eyes, he softly whispered, "L-Last na, promise. Pagkatapos nito, itatapon na kita."
But in the very back part of his mind, he doesn't want to throw away a notebook that was filled with memories that became a part of his being.
A notebook that haunted and reminded him that he conquered the very scariest part of being in love with Kim Mingyu.
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YOU ARE READING
Closure • meanie
Short Story| stand alone #2 | + three years later, he came back to ask for a closure. copyright © meaniempire, 2017
