oneirataxia | vkook

일곱 (ilgop)

Narrator's POV

jeongguk walked into his shared dorm with yoongi, casually walking backwards because he's still bidding goodbye to the lone bird who accompanied him home.

he closed the door softly when the bird left, saying a soft 'thank you'. he turned around after closing the door and walked straight towards the kitchen.

"hey, yoongi hyung, " his hyung just gave him a nod. jeongguk shrugged it off because that's just how his hyung is. after putting the groceries away, jeongguk sits next to yoongi who blinks sleepily at him.

they are enjoying the comfortable silence when someone slammed their innocent door harshly. they both stood up in reflex and started to curse whoever it is.

yoongi grumbled in annoyance and stormed off towards their front door, ready to throw hands if needed. he spotted taehyung right in front of their open door and he's still panting heavily.

"what the fuck, hoe? do you know how expensive doors are? " yoongi rolled his eyes at him, not worried one bit on why the younger is out of breath.

"is jeongguk home? "

"he's a perfectly functioning human being so no, he's not a home. duh, why wouldn't he be here? "

yoongi gave the younger the stink eye, still salty about the door and the wall. taehyung gave him the middle finger before pushing him out of the way and entered uninvited.

"bitch, respect your elders, "

"you gave me a long ass list on why i shouldn't, " the younger retorted and hugged jeongguk, who's still frozen near the couch. he hesitantly hugged taehyung back, patting his head for good measure.

"why did you—" taehyung cuts jeongguk off by pressing his lips against the other's lips. jeongguk went still, processing the situation they are in right now.

"hyung—what? i—"

"i like you, jeongguk. i've been crushing on you since that basketball game, when you almost worship me in the middle of the court. i was originally waiting for you to ask me out but you're taking way too long, "

"uhm—" jeongguk started but taehyung cuts him off again with a kiss. jeongguk sighs before giving in, kissing the older back. taehyung smiled in the middle of their kiss.

taehyung immediately pulled away when he felt something warm on his cheeks. he wiped it off, it's just a clear liquid. he looked up and gasped. jeongguk is crying.

"hyung—i'm sorry. i'm truly sorry, " jeongguk cups taehyung's face with both hands, caressing his cheeks gently. taehyung reaches up and wipes the younger's tears away with his thumbs.

"what are you sorry for? " he asked with soft and soothing voice, trying to calm the younger down. the latter sent him a bittersweet smile.

"i can't, hyung. i can't be with you—i shouldn't be with you, " taehyung's eyes widened when he realized where this is heading. they heard a soft click, indicating that yoongi left them alone.

"w-what? why? i thought you like me too? did i misread the signs you're giving me? " jeongguk shook his head making taehyung more confused than he already is.

"then what's the problem? "

"i'm the problem, "

"being friends with you is a mistake. i was satisfied to just admire you from afar. but then this basketball match ruined it all. we became friends because of it. before, i was entirely grateful to have you as a friend, "

jeongguk cuts himself off with a sniffle, wiping his own tears away.

"i was content on being your friend, i wasn't gonna ask for more. but then, we unexpectedly got more closer. we're practically attached to each other, both mentally and physically. it was all fine and dandy but it just have to come back, "

"what came back? "

"i thought i finally have a chance and here you are, confessing. i would like to accept your confession but i know it will only hurt you more. hyung, i want you to be happy. i'm sorry but i'm not the one who can give you the happiness that you deserve, "

jeongguk pushed taehyung away gently, not wanting to hurt the older further.

he didn't expect the older to like him back. he wanted to be happy because his feeling were reciprocated, but he can't. he didn't want to give the older a short lived happiness, knowing that he will cause more pain.

"please go, " jeongguk practically begged taehyung, pushing him towards the front door. taehyung shook his head and stays rooted on his place. he won't leave until he knows why.

"why? jeongguk, you didn't explained why. i know you like me, jeongguk! but why are you pushing me away now? now that i feel the same way? i just don't understand, "

taehyung said while crying silently. he tried to hug the younger but the latter moved away.

"jeongguk just tell me the fucking reason! i won't accept this shit! " taehyung yelled at jeongguk in anger. it hurts.

and then, jeongguk's face hardens. the pain and sadness in his eyes went away, replaced by hatred. deep hatred.

"you know what? you're so fucking annoying. howw many times do you want me to tell you to leave, huh? i'm so sick of your clingy ass! "

jeongguk yelled back at him, his voice is so low and cold unlike his usual warm and sweet voice. taehyung immediately went still, his whole body is trembling from fear yet the emotion in his eyes stayed the same.

silence.

two boys staring at each other, one with deep hatred and the other with pure love.

tears falls, body thrown into the cold, hard floor.

a pained yelp can be heard throughout the silent room. then the standing person says,

"i never loved you in the first place. fucking leave me alone! "

he storms out, taking the crying boy's heart with him.

the other lets out a loud sob as he stares longingly at the slowly fading figure of his almost lover.

"why? why do i still love you even though i know it will only hurt me? "

taehyung proceeds to stand up, running after jeongguk. he stood outside the latter's dorm and peeks at every corner but he couldn't even catch a glimpse of the younger's shadow.

taehyung leans on the wall for support and cries his heart out again. his heart almost feels like it's being squeezed so tightly, it hurts too much.

"i won't give up on you, jeongguk. just watch me, "