1962 ── lily evans

SIXTEEN

SIXTEEN

LENNON RESORTED to going home a few days after her tumultuous reunion with Lily. Her mother had initially been furious, but the act subsided as she pulled Lennon into an iron-tight hug as relieved tears swelled in her eyes. She was still grounded - of course - but the panic of her leaving had at least made her realise how pleased she was to have her eldest child at home, safe.

A month of so later, she was released from the confines of her home. By this time, autumn had fully settled in, and the air was crisp at the best of the times, filling her the delightful chill of the season. The month had been mind-numbingly boring, a compilation of eating, sleeping and completing chores for her mother, who was still beyond angry. 

To her surprise, Lily came to her door more than once, probably in hopes of apologising and patching up her now trampled relationship with Lennon. Mrs Lowe made sure to send her away each time, however, alerting the ginger that she could come back to see her at the end of the long month.

Thus, naturally, she was surprised to awaken to the sight of Lily in her bedroom doorway, chewing thoughtfully at her thumbnail. Her heart fluttered at the way her ginger hair framed her petite features so flawlessly, and yet she still left a sour taste in Lennon's mouth, like rotten milk.

"What are you doing here?" Lennon asked, voice raspy as she awoke from her slumber. She rubbed the sleep out of her eyes, almost hoping the ginger was just a half-asleep hallucination; unfortunately, she wasn't.

"I missed you," Lily mumbled, taking a few tentative steps towards the bed. Lennon quickly cut her off quickly, and Lily halted immediately in her tracks, standing helplessly in the centre of the room. 

"I don't know that you deserve to miss me, considering what you said to me a month ago." Lennon quirked an eyebrow, staring at her old friend with distaste.

"Len, I do. Really. I just..." Lily trailed off, eyes falling to the floor as Lennon's glare burned into her skin.

"You just what? Spit it out," Lennon huffed, being particularly harsh. Then again, she always was at this time in the morning, and a part of her believed that Lily really deserved it. "Look, is that all you came here to say? That you miss me?"

"No! I do, Len, I really do. But Jam- the boys." As soon as she'd mentioned her boyfriend, she knew it had been a bad idea, and quickly attempted to change her statement, but Lennon had already caught what she was going to say. "They told me they want you at the meetings again. That they haven't been the same without you."

"That's all well and good, but do you really reckon my mum will let me out somewhere like that again? I think she's rather lock me in a cage and leave me to die." 

Lennon rolled her eyes - she was always one for being overly dramatic, but Lily was so used to it she didn't even bat an eyelid at the obscure remark.

"Just say you're at mine, Len! C'mon. We all really miss you. I really miss you," Lily insisted.

 Lily's desperate eyes and pleading words made Lennon's stomach twist, tying itself into knots of longing that were impossible to undo. God, why did she have to be so irresistible?

There was a pregnant pause, and both girls felt the awkward atmosphere sinking in with each enduring second that passed. Soon, seconds turned to minutes, and not a word had been uttered. Of course, something had to be said, and as usual, it was Lennon who broke the silence.

"Fine. But not for you. For Sirius. And Remus and Peter. We're still not fine. It doesn't work like that," Lennon asserted, compelling herself to shoot a glare in the ginger's direction.

"Thank you! They'll be so happy. I'm so happy, Len. I'll make it all up to you, I promise." Lily grinned, lips reaching from ear to ear as the excitement bubbled up inside of her.

"Right," Lennon mumbled, staring back at the ceiling - she was beginning to find Lily's joviality frustrating. "You've got a lot to make up for, after all."

"How about we make up over coffee at Horace's? For old time's sake?" Lily suggested, features brushed with the clear traces of teenage hope.

The question was like a painful stab to the chest for Lennon. Horace's would be too bittersweet to visit ever again; too many bad occurrences followed the duo's last visit there. Had they not gone, perhaps the brunette wouldn't be in the state she was in now. She'd be with Lily, their fierce friendship strong as ever, and she'd still like boys - wouldn't she?

Then again, she'd have never met the boys. She could happily live without James, but Sirius, Remus and Peter? They were becoming like a second home for Lennon, and the fact she hadn't seen them in a month was eating away at her more than she'd have ever assumed it would.

"I'd rather not. I need to shower. Can you," she hesitated for a moment, silence hovering there as she considered the harshness of her next question. "Can you show yourself out, yeah?"

The ginger's breath hitched in her throat, letting out a barely audible gasp of disappointment. She was thankful Lennon hadn't noticed, because she was sure this new boldness the brunette has possessed would have allowed her to question her surprise. It was unlike Lennon to kick Lily out ever; in fact, in all their years of friendship, she wasn't sure it had even happened once.

"Eh, yeah. Sure," Lily mumbled, her tongue tripping over her words as she stood aimlessly in the centre of the room, bewildered beyond belief. "So we'll see you at the meeting next week?"

"Sure. Something like that."

Lennon climbed out of her bed, the cold air tingling against the pale skin of her shins. Pushing past her old friend, Lennon stumbled out of her bedroom, thankful to have passed the ginger as tears began to trickle down her cheeks. Lily stood silently, turning towards the door as she watched Lennon disappear into the bathroom, incredulous as to what had just happened. Although she found it hard to believe, she knew what was happening: Lily Evans' best friend was slipping through her fingers, and with each desperate grasp to hold on, she only managed to fall further away.