Dagger's Point

Chapter Fifteen

We both freeze for a moment, neither one of us moving. I can't believe that I am here, sitting on his back and still breathing as the seconds flick away. I try to read his body language, to get a feel for what he is thinking, but I can't see anything nor does he feel on edge. Slowly, I move my feet into the stirrups, being extra careful not to bump his sides, trying to stay as gentle and calm as I can be. Next, I adjust the reins, still waiting for some type of explosion to happen. He hasn't been out for exercise in so long, let alone ridden. We can't stand here for forever and impatience presses into me. My calves are against his side, the pressure that of a butterfly but still he bounds forward, almost throwing me off balance. My seat feels somewhat unsteady but I have yet to touch the reins, as he stands a few more feet away, and I can feel the tension in his limbs. I don't know if he's going to bolt, rear or buck, but still I try again, being even more gentle as I lift the reins up ever so slightly. There is one step then another and before I know it we are walking, though he feels stiff, neck as high as it can go. I reach forward to run my hand along his neck to try and comfort him, though I doubt it works as nothing changes. I don't do anything, just allowing him to walk past the paddocks and towards the trees that reside behind them, their branches reaching out crookedly at me. For a moment I think that I feel someone watching us, the back of my neck prickling, but when I turn to look behind me there is no one that I can see. I can feel the spook coming before it happens, Dagger feeding off of my nerves. His spine curves to the side, his head going the opposite way. It isn't intense enough for me to lose my seat as I stick with him, but it is enough that I take a deep breath to try to calm the nerves and paranoia. There is no way that anyone would be out here at this time anyways, there isn't any reason for it.

I know I shouldn't push him any more, especially in the dark where I can barely see but I can't bring myself to circle back to the stud barn, instead we wander, him slowly relaxing as we go and gradually becoming more supple, something that I appreciate. This is far from what I had expected from him, and the mere fact that he hasn't even attempted to misbehave yet is beyond me. So much for being a demon horse; I have ridden plenty of mares that make him look like nothing more than a lamb. To hell with him having killed two people, there is nothing here besides him being a scared horse. I can't believe what has been brought upon him, it all seems even more ridiculous and even more of a waste. I ride him at the same pace back to the stud barn, convincing myself that there is no one there even when I see a possible shadow shift.

As we approach, I feel something shift, the atmosphere coiling around us, as his legs become sniff, loud snorts echoing. He halts, his hooves prancing against the cobblestone, whole body quivering. I don't know what is wrong, so I wait, just for another moment. I think one of the shadows move, but I can't be sure, as Dagger pivots sharply, bolting into the darkness.

I cling to him, burrowing my hands into his stringy mane and avoiding the urge to grip with my legs. I don't think I have ever been run-away with before and my mind whirls in an attempt to remember what to do. But, I don't think he is going to stop, his whole body feels like fear, intense enough that it plunders into me. For a moment I get swept up into the run, the pounding of his hooves, and the way I crouch on his back.

Then I remember myself, my own fear surging forward. I am on a runaway horse. The thought feels firm in my mind, as I gather some sense of myself. Sitting up I take a better hold of the reins, testing to see if the bit is between his teeth. It isn't. But his speed does not change as I give a gentle tug. Something about circles comes to my mind as branches begin to scrape against my leg, he is running alongside the woods now, still a crazed beast. Using my left rein I begin to pull ever so slightly, trying to angle his head just enough that he follows it, but not to the point of unbalancing him and causing us to crash to the ground.

My right calf is firm against his side, pushing him, encouraging to follow my command. He does, it is only the slightest of movements, but I can feel the shift, and the confusion there as well. I continue this, gradually pulling tighter, until, finally he slows to something the resembles a canter. I can feel him calming now, the slightest hint of relaxation, but I can also feel how exhausted he is as we drop down to a walk, his sides heaving and hot. I want to let him rest and to take a breath myself, but we need to get back, even if I have to dismount and walk him. I don't know how late it is, but soon enough Dad is going to take notice that I am not home and that my truck is still parked outside. If he comes looking for me, I'm screwed.

We begin the trek back to the stud barn, or at least in the direction that I think it is in. I don't know where I am, just that I am still on property, the darkness does nothing to help me figure out where I am. It feels like an eternity later when the outline of the stud barn comes into view, relief surges through me at the sight of it. Dagger is more or less entirely exhausted, his head hanging low and each step feeling like lead. I just risked his life, yet I don't regret it, no matter how stupid it may have been. With the cobblestone underfoot Dagger doesn't seem to be wary at all, nothing like before he bolted. Maybe it was a fluke, just a sudden burst of energy that only a horse who has been locked up for so long can feel.

It doesn't take long for me to untack him and run the curry comb over his body. I feel bad about not spending more time before I rush off, but I don't want to risk Dad coming out to find me. It's bad enough that I'm on his and Mr. Oxford's radar's, I don't need to do anything else for them to catch onto to me and what I'm up to.