inside out。 [m.yg x p.jm] ✘

七

jm;一

i can't believe I'm doing this.

jm can't stop saying these words in his mind while he reads yet another book. his 3-week long existence basically consist of him reading books, eating, or sleeping. 20% for taking over the controls whenever dark blue lights would flicker again.

it's a relief yoongi's only experiencing it sometimes.

Mr. Bang insisted that he should read books about how the human world works. Saying it's a lot harder out there because there are many other people with different personalities.

jm can't help but think about what might happen to him out there.

he's worried if he could do a good job, trying to make yoongi happy. We couldn't blame him. Being what you're not is hard.

He took another book from the bookshelf of the far right side of the room, opposite to where today's memories are. he's nervous to say the least, and scared. very scared.

what if he gets lost? the world outside is too big and all he ever saw inside yoongi's head is the dark world he lived in. all the screams and cries. He saw all of it and it scares him to experience it personally. Is it that painful that yoongi cried himself at night? is it more painful than cuts? yoongi never cried when he got a cut. and that's something because jm experienced it and knew how painful it can get.

knowing how he's so clumsy, he'll probably experience having wounds 24/7.

"you think too much, jm." Mr. Bang yet again appeared before him for the third time. It's quite irritating considering how jm hates Bang's ass so much. The sole reason why he wants to go out of yoongi's mind immediately.

Only Bang Sihyuk could make jm wish he had lived as a normal person and not as yoongi's emotion

"You'll be fine outside. It's just like here, but, ya know, more people.. and different places." Mr. Bang placed the cup of tea he's holding on the coffee table in front of jm. "you'll learn how to adapt quickly."

"how can you say that without hesitation?"

"because yoongi can." he sat comfortably with his right leg above his left, crossing it and placing his intertwined fingers over his stomach. "yoongi can adapt quickly, even in harsh events. you may say he's weak, but he's absolutely not."

"I make him weak."

"park jimin, know that you give him more strength to face more difficult challenges. the greater the pain, the greater you'll gain" his boss opened his palm and his cup of tea flew on top of it. he sipped a small amount and place it on his lap.

"park jimin?"

"it will be your name outside." jm nodded, understanding. "I bought everything you need on earth. No need to worry." he gave him one last smile before standing up and disappearing like a bubble.

He's scheduled to head out tomorrow and somehow, he felt no sorrow. Unlike other humans he saw in a drama yoongi watched yesterday. He doesn't feel the need to fight someone just so he could stay.

There's no big reason to stay. He weren't too close to the others so there isn't really something to lose. He just need to remember to do the exact same thing outside. to stay low. And never be close to anyone, it'll be easier that way, right?

the day ended and the night came without much thought. Alike to the thought of finally being able to go outside and to not see bang sihyuk's face every fucking time he needs to be alone.

he didn't need to pack anything and prepare. Everything he needs is prepared.

"Are you ready for tomorrow?" Jay asked while scanning the book titles in the bookshelves. His fingers barely touching the books. to be honest, it looked like he was just looking at the book covers, when a title and design would catch his attention he would get it from it's place. "I don't quite see the nervousness or anything" he returned the book back from the shelf after looking at the contents inside it. seems like he doesn't like the book..

"I don't really know. I feel like it will just be another day, just different people and different places" this is, of course, a contrary to his thoughts before. he's a lot calmer now.

"that's right, you'll be safe. we'll be with you" jay walked over to jm—jimin's seat and patted him on his shoulder and heading straight to the wide glass wall, looking over at the limbics doing all the work to keep yoongi's long term memory safe. some unnecessary ones thrown into the void. "remember. look at where you're walking, some strangers are very rude. be very polite, or people would judge you. be sure to filter every single word you're going to say. look at your left and right before crossing the street. do-"

jimin cut hoseok off with a chuckle. not once giving a glance, saying "I'll be fine. I'll do my best"

Jay turned away from the city of long term memories and looked at jimin, who's reading a book, once again. "I trust you jm. Good luck"

and wow. just three words and the worries are back.

They trust me. They're entrusting yoongi to me.

But he's merely an emotion who lived for only almost a month. How can they put so much trust in him? How can they easily give all the important work in his hand? and how is his perfect ass still not fucking flat when he didn't even go out of his seat too much?

With his thought focusing on his last statement, he quickly stood up and put the book back into the shelf and started to walk around, fearing that his ass would become flat.

On second thought though, he's quite tired now that so much thought bombarded him, and to add up to all the stress, he's now pressured by the thought that possibly everyone is counting on jimin.

To sum everything up. The controls would be destroyed once jimin would fail the mission, if he would succeed, the fate is yet to be known for min yoongi.

But if for some reason, the controls would be broken, min yoongi would be a human without emotion. His brain would function. His heart would pump blood, and that's it. No more, no less. The mind won't think and worry, the heart won't feel and be broken.

For now, all that matters is how jimin would go through all shit and help yoongi.