The Entirely Truthful Observation Records of My Extra Ordinary Family

22: Is that what you actually meant to do?

Walk

Grandpa Ordinary: Did anyone ever tell you that you walk way too fast, Still?

Still: Uh, no. I think I walk at a pretty slow pace.

Grandpa Ordinary: Well, this morning when I followed you on your way to school, I couldn't catch up because of how fast you were going.

Me: Yeah, when he got home he said that because you were so far up ahead, he lost sight of you at one point and then got lost. It took him an hour and a half to find his way home this morning.

Still: Why didn't you just call out to me grandpa? I would have waited for you! We could've walked together!

Grandpa Ordinary: I thought that at your age, it'd be embarrassing for you to walk alongside your grandpa on your way to school so I just tried to maintain a reasonable distance. I just didn't think that you'd get so far up ahead.

Still: ...I think it looks worse that you just secretly followed behind me...If someone else saw you they might've thought I was being stalked by an elderly man.

Grandpa Ordinary: ...Oh

ーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーー

Game

[A couple days after the previous anecdote]

Grandpa Ordinary: I think Still has a boyfriend.

Me: Really? What makes you say that?

Grandpa Ordinary: Someone picked her up when she was halfway to school today.

Me: ...Uh, how do you know that, grandpa?

Grandpa Ordinary: I secretly followed her on her way to school again but I that's not the issue here. The issue is Still's got a man and his family probably has money because he has a car!

Mrs. Ordinary: I was the one who picked her up today...

Grandpa Ordinary: What?

Mrs. Ordinary: Yeah, she called me this morning and said that she suddenly got a leg cramp so I said I would drive her the rest of the way since I happened to be at home.

Grandpa Ordinary: So it wasn't her boyfriend?

Mrs. Ordinary: No.

Grandpa Ordinary: ...Why does neither of my granddaughters have any game?

ーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーー

Loan

Me: When are you going to pay me back the money you owe me, Still?

Still: I can't right now. I'm broke.

Me: Wasn't it just payday for you?

Still: I already spent everything I made.

Me: ...I'm never getting that money back am I?

Still: Don't worry, if you really need it back now I'll just borrow money from dad.

Me: You're going to pay me back by borrowing money from dad?

Still: Yup.

Me: ...It's just an endless cycle of debt for you isn't it?

Still: Nah, dad usually forgets that he lends me money so I likely won't have to pay him back. You on the other hand, never seem to forget. Figures. You forget your own name after two drinks and yet you never forget when I owe you money even when it's been months.

Me: Well, it'd be nice if you just once paid me back before half a year goes by, you know.

Still: It'll depend on how I feel like.

Me: ...I need to stop lending you money.