to you

calendar

today
was the day
my heart spent the minutes
before we met again
giddy and leaping with every beat,
skipping
through a field of your favorite flowers
with its joy singing from my lips.

today
was the day
my feet spent the minutes
before we met again
wandering the streets, the halls,
walking round and round
in infinite circles
in hope to bump into you
in case i may have missed you
on the last round.

today
was the day
my eyes spent the minutes
before we met again
searching for you amongst the crowd,
for your unmistakable and trademarked smile,
for your sparkle that glistened brightest out of us all.

today
was the day
we finally met again.
face to face
after months
and what felt like years.
you were as breathtakingly beautiful as ever.
we only got a few seconds together,
only a few words exchanged
when i realized
this may one of the last times
we'll ever be together
in the same place,
same time,
face to face.
and i made the mistake
of turning away.

months of waiting
for mere seconds.
the moment
i looked back for you,
you were pulled away
far into the sea of people.
i lost my chance.
i lost you.

today
was the day
i spent the minutes
after we met again
swiveling around,
searching for you yet again,
contemplating to call out for you,
to detach myself from the others
and spend the rest of my time
looking for you.
but i stood silent.

because i had a strong feeling in my gut
that i wouldn't ever be getting you
back.

today
was the day
i lost you.
what would
tomorrow
be?

and i wonder
is the day nearing,
the day where it's finally time to

let go?