I'M KARA DANVERS

Chapter 11

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Lena had flown with Supergirl many times before, but only in her dreams, and nothing in her wildest dreams came close to comparing to the real thing. Taking off had her feeling like she'd left her stomach on her office balcony, and her heart raced as they climbed higher and higher into the sky.

In Lena's dreams of flying, she gazed up at the stars, shining so brightly backdropped by an inky black sky. Or she looked down to the streets below, marvelling at how small the people were as they went about their lives. All those complex people with their complex stories.

But with the inescapable reality of today weighing heavy on her shoulders, she just couldn't do that. When she looked down at the people below, all she saw was a grieving woman, widowed at Lex's hands. She saw a son and a daughter, who would now grow up without a father. She saw office workers heading home for the day, murmuring conspiringly about how you could never trust a Luthor. Maybe they were right.

Lena closed her eyes against the thoughts pressing against her mind and rested her head against Supergirl's shoulder. She focused on the rhythm of her heartbeat, steady and strong, and the way the Kryptonian's skin prickled as she traced her fingertips across her clavicle.

For the first time all day, Lena took a deep breath and felt like air was actually entering her system. It was here, in this brief moment of peace, that she realised how truly exhausted she was. She felt weary right down to her bones.

"Do you do this for all the girls?" she murmured quietly, partly in an effort to keep herself awake.

"Only the really pretty ones," Supergirl responded low in her ear. Lena found herself smiling, in spite of everything. It was small, but it still counted.

Lena closed her eyes for the rest of the flight, focusing on the breeze against her face and the feeling of Supergirl's arms around her back and under her legs to keep her mind firmly rooted in the present moment until they touched down gently.

"Here's your stop," Supergirl said as they made contact.

Lena lifted her eyelids open and, sure enough, they were on her balcony. Supergirl shifted her grip and allowed Lena to slip to the ground. Lena stumbled slightly as gravity renewed its effect on her body, causing Supergirl to give a light chuckle.

"You'll get your sky legs soon enough."

"Sure beats traffic," Lena remarked as she straightened up. She folded her arms over her stomach and pressed her lips together. "Do you...do you have somewhere you need to be? I just feel like if I'm alone I'll drive myself crazy thinking about everything that's going on. Your presence... it relaxes me. Will you stay?"

Supergirl nodded. "As long as you need."

Lena gave a slight smile of relief, and indicated for Supergirl to follow her inside. She wasn't used to having guests around, but since she barely spent any time in her apartment, it was fortunately easy to keep tidy.

"I'd like to take a shower and change, if that's all right. Please, make yourself at home, I won't be long," she said.

Supergirl sat down on the couch, the very same couch she had laid on the night she had broken in. "Take as much time as you need, Lena. I'll be here."

Lena wanted nothing more than to wash this day right off of her. She stepped into the shower, turning the temperature up until it was scalding. She wondered how hot the water would have to be to rid her of this unclean feeling, this guilt that twisted at her stomach whenever she thought of Lex.

The worst part was that she knew that she still loved him, despite it all. He was her brother. Not by blood, no, but by something much stronger. He had always made her feel welcome in a house that was otherwise cold and unfeeling. He taught her about the world, about art and science and philosophy. He taught her to be ambitious, to be bold, to be fearless in the pursuit of her goals. He made her feel like she was worthy of the Luthor name, though it certainly didn't mean what it once did.