Dying Without You (Zero Kiryu x Suicidal! Reader)

Backstory (Cake - Melanie Martinez)

*****(Y/N)'s P.O.V.*****

'Everything's dark... Where am I?' I thought as I took in my surroundings noticing the black darkness that seemed to stretch out forever. A sudden brightness pierced the darkness I was consumed in and I saw a silhouette beyond the light which appeared to be yelling at another worriedly.

The silhouettes' voices slowly faded in.

"Zero, calm down. She's gonna be okay. We're lucky you found her when you did! Otherwise she would've been a goner." Was that Yuki?

"Shut up! I found her that way because of me! Had I never gotten so mad at her this wouldn't have happened!" Zero, I believe, was crying.... I made him cry.... Zero Kiryu was crying because of me.

It was then that the two came into full view and I saw their faces. "I think she's finally waking up. Took her a while huh Zero?" Yuki said with a smile that faded when she saw the pained look in Zero's eyes.

"I-I'm s-s-sorry Zero." I managed to get out and he gave me a look of confusion. "I broke my promise. I'm so sorry." A tear cascaded down my cheek as I began sobbing.

Let me rewind a bit for ya.

F L A S H B A C K

After making up my mind, I locked Tomoko and I's dorm room door and quickly dashed into the bathroom that was connected to our dorm. I locked that door and grabbed my razor when a knock came at the room door.

"(Y/N). I'm sorry about what went down between you and Zero, but I need you to open the door. I know it's hard, but we're here for you." Yuki called from outside jiggling the handle.

"Ju-just go-o awa-ay." I sobbed remembering how upset at me he had been and added a few scars to my collection.

"Make sure you call for one of us if you happen to need anything." Yuki sighed. I knew she was upset, but I was too busy erasing myself from the world. I was holding Zero and Yuki back. They probably think of me as a burden anyway. One less problem for them to have on their minds.

"IDIOT! WHY DIDN'T YOU BREAK DOWN THE DOOR?!" I heard a worried and irritated voice shout down the hall and the two doors breaking down by Zero slamming through them before my vision became dark.

E N D O F F L A S H B A C K

I felt horrible for putting Zero through all of that. He must've felt like it was his fault. I couldn't bring myself to blame him for it.

"It's fine (Y/N). It's hard to break habits like that. You need someone to stop you when those things happen. I would know." He replied and gave me the soft look he always gave to Yuki and my heart skipped a beat.

Jesus Christ, Zero. Stop looking at me like that or I might actually have a heart attack. I thought nervously. Careful not to hurt me Zero wrapped his arms around me and placed his head on my stomach. "When are you gonna let me relax and stop worrying about you?" He mumbled as he began to fall asleep.

"You know," Yuki began then paused most likely choosing her words wisely. "Zero really cares about you and he's always worrying about whether you're gonna be alright or not. You just have to realize that he doesn't trust people easily which makes it.... difficult to tell him things without him getting defensive. And, he wasn't mad at you."