Dying Without You (Zero Kiryu x Suicidal! Reader)

Becoming a Vampire

*****Zero's P.O.V.*****

As I began waking up from my long ass nap, a smell of ash and fire filled my senses. I immediately snapped my eyes open to find the stables burning to ash. I quickly shook (Y/N) awake and told her what was happening. Her eyes widened as she looked around in horror. 

"No! Not again!" She screamed pulling me to my feet and dashing to the exit, gripping my hand tightly, but a sudden thought caused me to pull back on her arm. 

"(Y/N)! The horses!" I shouted over the nearing sirens. We dashed in and began freeing the horses, but Lily's gate lock was stuck and I couldn't get it open. "It won't open!" 

She rushed over and tried it with me, but it simply wouldn't budge. I decided that since the place was already being destroyed I was fine to, and began breaking the small gate, setting the white stallion free. (Y/N) and I made another dash for the exit dodging falling parts of the roof. I noticed a piece about to fall right in front of the stables only accessible exit and picked (Y/N) up, running to the large opening quickly, knowing which on of us would make it out alive. 

"(Y/N)? Would you live for me, if I died?" I asked and watched as memories flashed in her eyes. 

"Don't talk like that! You're going to live through this, or we're going to die together!" She shouted with the fear of losing me in her eyes. 

"Just answer me!" A few moments passed before a confident, but truly broken response reached my ears. 

"I promise. I will. Even if you die I'll live everyday as though it were my last." 

"Then do it!" I shouted throwing her out of the closing space before a large timber came down on my back causing me to black out after her screams resonated around me. 

*****(Y/N)'s P.O.V.*****

"Then do it!" Zero shouted throwing me out of the burning stables before a part of the roof came down on his back. 

"Zero! No! You can't leave me! I can't lose him!" I screamed as Hanabusa held me back. "Kaname! Do something!"

Kaname glared at the burning structure for a moment before sighing and rushing inside. "Where's Kaname going?" Yuki asked looking around for someone or something. "Wait! Where's Zero?"

Those words made me want to run in after Kaname, but I watched as he quickly walked toward the school with Zero on his shoulders. "Zero!" I yelled somehow breaking free from Hanabusa and taking off after Zero. "Please, stay with me. Don't leave me behind like everyone else I've ever loved has." 

I had never been so terrified to lose someone. I knew there was a chance he could survive being a vampire, and his spine would heal, but that was only if he was given blood and that still depended on how strong the blood he was given would be.

There was also the chance that if he did manage to heal, he might be paralyzed which caused even more worries of how paralyzed he would be. From the waist down? From the waist up? Maybe everything except from the neck up? 

But the one worry that horrified me was if he died. He couldn't leave me. I needed him and I wished I could die with him, but...

I promised. Promised... that I would live. For him. I intend to keep that promise, but I didn't know if I was strong enough to handle living if I lost him. I would be bullied again and there would be no one to protect me. I might fall back into that black hole of depression and might not be able to pull myself out. And Yuki would be too crushed to help pull me out. I would slowly fall apart and then- 

"(Y/...N)," Zero mumbled letting me know he was still alive and pulling me from my nightmarish fantasy. "Live... for... me.." 

I had to live because of those words. Even when he probably knew he was close to death, he still fought to tell me to live. 

Live for me. His words resounded in my head making me stronger by the second. Those three words helped me to realized that even if Zero died, I would have the courage and the strength to go on and live. For him. 

"The things I do for you Zero..." I mumbled and I swear he cracked a smile as Kaname placed him on the infirmary bed and slit his wrist open with his fangs. "Kaname! What are you-,"

He cut me off and placed his wrist near Zero's mouth opening it. He was... saving Zero. "Would you like him to live? If so this must be done. I can't promise he'll be perfect, but it'll be enough to keep him alive and somewhat able."

I nodded my head and watched as Zero unknowingly gulped down Kaname's blood and began moaning in pain as the fractured bones that made up his spine slowly moved back into place. 

"I just hope he isn't paralyzed..." I murmured knowing that Kaname's vampiric hearing would pick it up. 

"So do I. He's a pawn in my game. The knight that protects my queen. I cannot possibly find another that could protect her better." 

"Then I'll have to train harder and take that role for now and possibly for a while. Kaname, no one can stop you. I want to be a vampire so I can be stronger and so I can have the strength to protect Zero and Yuki. So, please, make my wish to be stronger come true." I quietly said raising my wrist to his mouth. He gave me a look that told me I could back out, but I refused to give in that easily. 

"I can promise you that this will be painful. The transformation is not easy and you won't be as strong as you think immediately. It will take time." He said and sank his fangs into my scarred wrist taking my humanity as he took my blood. When he pulled away a sharp pain shot throughout my entire being. The pain was mental, physical and, worst of all, emotional. I screamed and cried pulling the attention of Cross and Yagari to the room. I could suddenly taste something metallic in my mouth, something that smelled distinctly like roses and copper mixed. It enthralled me and I really wanted more. I quickly took hold of the wrist in front of me that was dripping that addictive liquid to the floor and lapped up any that stained that wrist. It was Kaname's blood and I was now a vampire judging by the fangs that were now growing in my mouth. When I pulled away Kaname smiled and caught me as I blacked out from the excessive pain that my body couldn't handle.