The Night You Met Kim SeokJin [BTS Imagine] [HIATUS]

Chapter 11: I Love You

In the backstage bathroom:

Your eyes are red and sore from sobbing, your foundation melting off in frustrated streaks. 

"I'm so fucking stupid," you sniffle to yourself. So stupid...Jin would never love me. I'm nothing to him, he said so himself. God, why'd I let myself be hurt this way?

You jump at a bang on the door and shut off the faucet that was muffling your tears. "Leave me alone," you cry out with a shaky voice.

"Katie..." you hear Jin cooing on the other side, and your heart breaks even further.

"Why are you even here, huh? Since I mean nothing to you?" you spit out at him, sobbing uncontrollably into your hands, not caring whether anyone hears now, sinking down onto the tile floor. The door softly creaks open, and you feel warm, safe arms wrap around you snugly...no. It feels wrong. You shrug Jin off you harshly, turning away from him. 

"Katie, please..." Jin pleads.

"Go away, Kim SeokJin. I can't look at you right now." You scoot as far away from him as possible.

You hear a regretful sigh, followed by an aching pause. "I'm sorry, but I can't do that." You snap your head back around to glare at your 'best friend', but upon seeing the look of guilt and remorse etched on the handsome man's features, your anger softens. He approaches you carefully, as if you were glass about to shatter, crouching down and offering a hand to you. You hesitate at first, but you can't resist the pleading look in his eyes, his warm, soft eyes that promise everything will be okay. So you take it. Your small hand fits perfectly into Jin's larger one, and you smile through the tears. He smiles back and helps you stand, embracing you fiercely in an instant. You hold your breath, his embrace squeezing more sobs from your body you didn't realize you still had.

Jin whispers to you with insistence, "I can't do that, because I won't allow you to be sad around me. I won't let you cry," he cradles you closer to his broad chest, his heat warming up your cold being. "Katie, I'm so sorry. I was stupid; I'm an idiot. I was scared, but that's no excuse for my inconsiderate words." Jin pulls you back to inspect you, wiping your tears away with a paper towel and kissing both of your cheeks with his soft, plump lips. You whimper up at him, still tremendously hurt by his earlier statements to Namjoon. 

"Even though I was unsure, even if I'm not allowed to date, or love, or do what I really want,  I still shouldn't have said that night meant nothing to me," Jin continues, and your breathing slows a bit, anticipating every single syllable of his speech. "Because, that's not true," he breathes out, holding your chin gently in his hand, gazing into you longingly with tear brimmed eyes. "But I made you cry again, and that's unacceptable. I fucked up," Jin's voice cracks, and tears begin rushing down his face as well. 

Going numb, you remain silent. You did, you did fuck up, you think to yourself, your anger returning swiftly. "Then what do I mean to you, if not nothing?" you shout at him, weary of this game he plays, shrinking away from his touch. "What are we? What is this? Should I even come to Korea now? I'm not a toy to be played with, Kim SeokJ-" before you can finish your sentence, your lips are engulfed by another's with determined passion, this time on purpose. Jin deepens the kiss, moving his lips with yours desperately, you barely keeping up. It feels amazing, perfect and cathartic after so long of pretending. Entire body tingling, lips on fire, you clutch his black hair in your hands, crashing into his body that yearns for yours as much as you yearn for it. After a minute of this flame, Jin pulls away for breath, kissing your forehead deeply and exhaling. You blink, gasping for air and assuming this is another daydream, but realize it's actually happening. He finally kissed me... you puffy cheeks glow beet red.