Flowey x Reader: Teach Me how to Feel

Were You Going Insane?

-Author's Note-
Ugh, sorry I haven't been updating this that much. Damn you, writer's block. Also, I wanted to ask you guys a few questions. First one, do you mind mild swearing in this story? I'm not ever going to say anything major, but I just wanted to know if you guys were okay with it. Secondly, what are your thoughts on the story so far? I would really appreciate some more feedback! Also, thank you for all the support on this. I can't believe we've gotten to two hundred views already, that's insane. Enjoy the chapter!

-Flowey's POV-
That human. That fricking human.

They're so nice. I don't understand why they're being so kind to me. After I almost killed them before. After I've been such a little jackass. I don't get it.

Humans are pretty weird. Says the talking flower, but still. I feel weird too. I feel like... I feel something that I can only recall from Asriel's broken memories. I don't know how to describe it. I feel like I'm almost able to grasp that feeling. I feel so messed up but it's... I feel okay.

I'm not supposed to feel this way as a flower. I don't have a soul, and no soul means no feelings. But it's like little fragments of feeling are coming back to me. I'm still numb, but not as numb as before. I still can't feel right, but I'm trying. I'm trying to be nice. I'm trying to... I don't know. I'm trying to feel again. I haven't tried in so long.

What is this feeling? It's weird... not unpleasant though. I just... I feel... I don't know. I can't... I can't describe this weird emotion that hasn't touched me in lifetimes.

I still can't feel it completely. But it's there. I know it is. It is present inside of me, but I still can't... I can't grasp it. I can't see it completely. I still feel blind.

But I don't. I'm not completely blind. It's just... foggy. There's still a misty blanket of emptiness in me. This feeling is... it's like a blurred photo. You see it and try to recall faded memories, but it's not so clear and you can't really tell what's going on in the picture.

That's how I feel. I told you it was hard to describe.

But what is it? What is it? How is it there at all? How? Why? I don't understand. I have so many burning questions but no one to ask.

I guess I could ask them. They know how to feel. They're right near me as I'm thinking about all this. They're traveling with me to Waterfall. We're almost there too, which reminds me how close we are to the barrier. Not that close, but we're about a third of the way in.

But why am I nervous to ask them? Maybe because I don't feel the same way they do or something? They have a soul and can feel things and all that jazz, but I just... can't.

I mean, I can feel some things like pain, sadness... fear and loneliness. But nothing positive. Is this new feeling positive? I can't even tell.

Am I going crazy? Am I driving myself insane? Am I just making this new feeling up in my head?

Wait.

Could it... could it be...? Maybe it's... no. I can't feel that. Definitely not. I want to laugh at myself for even considering the thought. But still... I feel... weird...

...maybe I really am going insane.

-Your POV-
That flower! You thought, a little bit of frustration edging the voice in your mind. Flowey was driving you crazy all of a sudden. You were curious about him. Where did he come from? What's the thing about the Asriel guy? Maybe you could ask him.

No. Bad idea. He would get upset.

But you were still curious. You watched as he disappeared into the ground and you waited until he reemerged three yards away. You wanted to know. Why not?

You took in a breath. "Hey, uh... Flowey?" You asked, and he turned around.

"Yeah?" He looked calm.

"I don't want to make you upset but... I'm kinda curious... um, I'm kinda curious about, like, how you came to be a flower and stuff? I'm sorry, I just--please don't be mad! I--" You started to panic a little, thinking you had said the wrong thing before Flowey interrupted.

He nodded almost respectfully. "It's okay. It's fine. I don't mind your curiosity. I... I guess I can tell you." He looked distracted for a moment. "Also... I have a few questions for you."

Questions? Huh. "Sure. Ask away."

"I... I'll just answer your question first." Flowey said a little quickly. He sighed quietly. "So... where to begin?" He gave a short, tired chuckle.

"Take your time." You murmured patiently, kneeling down in the snow. You shivered at the touch. Both of you had stopped your chattering teeth and gotten sort of used to the temperature, but it was still a small shock to your skin.

Flowey smiled lightly, a sort of sweet sadness shining in his eyes. "Well... at the start of it all... my name was Asriel. I only have foggy memories of his, but I know what happened to him. One day, a child fell down into the Underground. Their name was Chara." He shivered slightly. "My family took them in. By the way, I think I might have mentioned this a while back but, Toriel and Asgore were Asriel's parents." He smiled painfully at the memories.

"I remember that." You said, cringing inwardly at your obnoxious response of, 'Toriel was your mother?!'.

"I was the prince of the Undergound. But then Chara came. They were... Chara was not a good person... but Asriel loved them. I knew love once. But one day...." Flowey gulped. "One day... Chara... they died... they...." Flowey seemed to be struggling to state the cause of Chara's death. Maybe it was too much for him to open up like this.

You stroked his petals gently. "You don't have to tell me. But I'm here if you want to vent."

"Thanks... (Y/N)...." Flowey replied. Sadness tinged his voice. "But I want to tell you. I want to get this off my chest. I don't want the guilt to linger any longer." He murmured. "Before Chara died... they told me that they wanted to see the flowers of their village one last time. So... after they died I used their soul to go through the barrier. I carried them to their village, but the humans...." He swallowed. "They attacked me. There was blood on the ground and hate in their poisonous words. I stumbled back to the mountain and fell back down the hole."

You didn't know what to say. So you were silent.

Flowey continued. "I died there, and my soul's essence was scattered among the flowers." He breathed out deeply. "Years went by. Asgore and Toriel's relationship turned sour and they split up. Asgore wanted to collect seven human souls to break the barrier and start a new war. But after a while, it seemed like no more humans were going to fall down here. So they started experimenting with determination." He drew in a shaky breath. "Alphys--a scientist--injected determination from the human souls into dying monsters. They turned... savage... and their bodies morphed into terrifying creatures."

"That's...." You couldn't find the words. Flowey closed his eyes as if trying to gather memories. Then he spoke again.

"After Alphys's experiments failed, the question arose. What if you inject determination into an inanimate object? And that's... that's how I was born. She injected determination into one of the flowers that Asriel's soul had been scattered on, and the fragments of his soul created me. I don't have a soul, but I'm technically Asriel. Sort of. I'm my own person too, though." He looked confused for a moment. "It's hard to explain."

"I'm sorry...." You murmured, and you couldn't help leaning in and giving Flowey a gentle hug. You didn't know that he had gone through so much... waves of empathy were practically drowning you. Flowey didn't flinch this time. Within a few seconds, vines were wrapped gently around your body. It wasn't... uncomfortable.

You held him in your arms for almost a minute until you both pulled away slowly. You smiled sadly at him, and he smiled back. "Now... how about that question of yours?"

Flowey stopped smiling a little. "Y-you know what... nevermind. It's okay." He said.

"Are you sure?" You asked.

"Yes." Flowey replied. "I'm fine." He sunk into the ground and reappeared a few feet away. "And... thanks... I'm glad I opened up to you. I feel better now."

You're welcome, Flowey.