12. Brown Lunch Bag and A Metal Red Box

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Dale had a cold metal lunch box the colour of phone boxes.

The two boys were sitting on the bench under a tree, side by side, holding their lunches. Both were too cautious of each other to open their lunch and eat, until Dale broke the awkward silence which was manifesting itself between their bodies.

"So, what have you got in your lunch?" he asked Iyden, who opened his brown bag.

"Nutella sandwiches. I always have them."

"Nice. Snaps, I have them too." Dale laughed, getting the box open and waved his sandwich in the air. Iyden smiled a little and rolled up his sleeves, and this time, he didn't flinch. "So...are you gonna tell me?"

Iyden looked at Dale: his big eyes, his mop of curly brown hair, his kind, innocent smile... There was something familiar about his face that Iyden couldn't pick out, but at that moment he didn't care.

"Yes. Sure, I'll tell you, but you can't tell anyone."

"Okay, I wont."

"I hurt myself."

The words were hard to form in his mouth, and even harder to come out, like lead that landed on the grass. Dale nodded slowly and deliberately- Iyden couldn't read his face. What did he think of him? What now?

"Why?" he asked simply.

Oh, the dreaded question.

"I've have...a difficult past and I remember most things that happened to me...I can't forget it...I could cut the pain out of my body, even though it then physically hurts." Iyden said cooly, impressed he'd managed not to sound too crazy. It was hard to talk about, and problematic to form the words properly.

"How does hurting yourself make it better?"

"It's as though...I can cut it out of myself." Dale winced as Iyden gulped. "The pain makes me realise that I'm safe now, I can control...I can control what happens to me. It's my decision to do it and that's better than othe people controlling me."

Iyden breathed, and suddenly felt the tears well up and his breath getting caught in his lungs. Oh God, tears. "I-I w-want to c-c-contol what h-happens now...because I c-can!"

Dale reached over, and wrapped his arms around Iyden, pulling him into a hug. Iyden gave up struggling within seconds- Dale was warm. He'd promised he wouldn't tell...He seemed nice.

"I know I don't know you very well," he began, "but I want to help, Iyden."

Iyden lifted his head from Dale's chest and sat upright.

"T-thanks. I...I j-just want to tell you...I'm weird, okay? I have problems. Don't expect things to be normal with m-me, Dale."

"Sounds like you're my boyfriend now or something." Dale laughed. He saw Iyden's horryfied face. "I'm joking okay? I joke alot!"

"I noticed." Iyden said, and stuck his tongue out at Dale. "That's how I joke." And he stuck his tongue out again.

Iyden watched blossoms fall off the trees in a swirl of pink snow around them. It's beautiful, he thought.

"Can I see now?" Dale asked, hoping he was casual enough. He was sitting close to Iyden. It was odd, he thought, how they had become close in an incredibly short time.

"No." Iyden said simply. "But I'l take your phone number."

Dale frowned, curious.

"I thought you didnt have one."

Iyden smiled to himself.

"I'm going to be sorting that out." he whispered, and they sat there until lunch ended.

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