Living Without A Name [FINISHED]

The Moon

Since the day I’ve woken up, my heart has been stopping nonstop. After Sai and I reunited, ninjas from the Leaf invaded the hideout at which we were located, so we had to move. Sai was met by the Leaf ninja, and stayed by them. He told me to go on, so I went with his orders. Sasuke was held up for a bit, but caught back up with me, along with Orochimaru and Kabuto. 

We moved to a hideout located in the Earth Country. I was put In the position of Orochimaru’s guard, and I happily cooperated. I hoped for the one day I would be able to see Sai again, but for now I would have to settle with Sasuke. 

It was strange, looking at Sasuke and knowing I’ve kissed him in the dream. That I’ve slept in his arms. But of course, Pein would creep into my mind and I’d have to lay down from fatigue. Living without him, or not knowing he even knows I exist, sucks the oxygen out of my lungs. I even miss the Deidara I thought I knew. 

I wonder all the time when I’d be able to see them. Sasuke said run ins with the Akatsuki happen frequently, and I’m honestly anxious. 

I don’t know why. I know they won’t act kindly towards me, even if they did know who I was. I’d have instant problems with Itachi, I knew. Sasuke would probably be with me, so future fights are predictable. 

Though, I’ve been planning a date to which I could visit the Akatsuki. I don’t know why I’ve been attracted to the distant forests, I knew once they’d find me I’d be killed. Still, I thought, I need to see him. 

Sasuke visits me frequently. He would sneak in my room at night and check up on me. He knew what I’d dreamed about before; that we had kissed and shared much more. Yet, he’d act as if nothing happened, as if I’ve never woken up from a dream. 

Nothing has happened between us, though. Occasionally, we’d look at each other, gazing into each others eyes, and share mental affection we could never speak of to each other. 

Even though I’d always think about it, I’d never love Sasuke as much as Pein. 

After months with Orochimaru, I’ve decided to go searching for the Akatsuki. I used the excuse of a midnight walk, but I was given a time to report back, or I’d be searched for and punished, if not killed. I agreed, and made my way outside.

I did something I hadn’t done in years, and went with my instincts. I’d never trusted it, but somehow I knew it could lead me to them. 

I headed off blindly into the darkness, leaping quickly through trees. A midnight walk turned into hours. I didn’t know how long I’ve been traveling until I reached the hideout. A large boulder stood before me, carrying a seal I knew I couldn’t touch. I thought for a moment, wondering how I could get inside. Then, a rustling sound from trees nearby snapped my head up. 

I checked the perimeter before I had arrived, and I hadn’t detected any sources of chakra. I frowned, waiting for whoever it was to show themselves. 

All was quiet until I felt a disturbance in the water I was standing on. I felt the waves move a little, then found myself flying against the boulder. I chocked up blood from the force of the impact, and fell to the earth. I forced chakra to my knees as I crushed back onto the surface of the water. 

I looked up, wiping the blood from my mouth. I blinked when I realized no one was there. 

“Show yourself you coward!” I shouted, standing back up. I winced as a sharp pain shattered in my chest, and I knew one of my ribs much of broke. I cursed, searching the area for chakra. This person obviously has a jutsu to hide it. 

The moment was still until the water in front of me was disturbed. A figure emerged quickly through the water, shouting, “Tada!~” I felt a hand go around my neck and slam me against the rock once more. 

I looked up at the enemy, having to squint from the pain. I instantly made out the man. The orange mask must of gave it away. “Tobi! Let me go!” I snapped, pulling at his hand. He gasped slightly, pulling away. “How did intruder know Tobi’s name?” He got close, and stuck his face close to mine.

“Who is intruder? Tobi was told to take care of her. Leader-sama wanted to make sure intruder was dead.” I gritted my teeth, looking at him directly. “Quit the act. You’re starting to piss me off.” I swatted my hand through the air, swiping off his mask.

He caught it in midair, but it was too late to cover up. He stiffened and looked directly at me. “You have my attention, Shiro.” Madara spoke, showing his real tone. “If you had known it was me, why pull the act?” I asked, filling my lungs full of air. “Because I didn’t know you’ve known my identity.”

“How do you know?” He asked, getting closer. “How do you know about Tobi?” 

I shook my head, frowning. “It’s hard to explain. I’ll just tell you Orochimaru had something to do with it.” He nodded in understanding, and placed a hand on my shoulder. “I haven’t seen you in years, Shiro.” 

I looked up at him, wincing. “It’s not like I’ve been looking forward to this reunion.” I remember the way he’d touched me in my dream, and I shook at the sudden chill. I stepped back from him, backing against the rock. 

He shook his head, looking up to the moon. “I don’t think you came all the way here to reject me.” I shook my head in response, looking to the ground and grabbing my shoulder. 

“Why are you here?” He asked, looking back towards me. 

“Actually, I’m here to see Pein.”