"Why are you so fucking sad all the time?"
"Because the end just never comes"
-
Jahseh has secrets, Willow knows that. Willow has secrets too, Jahseh doesnt know that... Will she run away from the truth? Or will she stick around long enough to unc...
Every single day I'd go to that building. I never saw him there again.
A part of me wanted to desperately see him again. The pondering look on his face, the body language he shared.
I'd stay for hours. Waiting. He never came.
One day I had given up. Picking up my stuff i had exited the building, making my way home.
After about walking for 10 minutes i heard a voice. "Sorrow." The familiarity in it made me stop. I turned around to find X standing there, behind me.
"I thought I'd never see you again." I spoke softly.
He shrugged, averting his gaze away from me. "I've been busy I guess." He said.
Nodding I turned around, ready to keep walking home.
"You're leaving already?" He said, causing me to stop and turn around again.
"I mean yeah, theres no reason for me to stay." I said, hoping that my words had slightly bothered him.
"Stay. For me." He replied.
"I don't even know you, you could be a serial killer for all i know." I protested.
"I guess there's only one way to find out, isn't there?" He challenged, backing away and turning a corner.
Where was he going?
I decided to follow him. "Wait up!" I called, running and turning the corner to catch up with him.
He was entering a.. Pub? Fuck.
I walked up to the bouncer seeing as there was literally no line.
He looked me up and down and spoke. But not to me. "JAHSEH! This the one you was talking about?"
A voice from inside called out, "YEAH LET HER IN!"
He let me through and as I entered I was immediately was blinded by flashing lights.
X stood in the middle of the room. It was empty. An empty pub? I scoffed to myself, thats not something you usually see.
"So your name is Jahseh?" I said, taking in my surroundings.
He quickly nodded. "I wanna show you something." He said.
"What is it?" "I couldn't get the image of you crying out of my head. It reminded me a lot of myself actually."
I remained silent, walking up to him. "What about it?" I finally said.
"Sorrow.. Why were you really crying?" He asked.
Because so many things are wrong, i feel like i cant breathe on a daily basis, this pain in my heart wont go away theres a missing part of my heart, a permanent hole in it that can't be filled, because he left and I dont exist to him anymore. I thought to myself...
"Because they sold my building, remember?" I lied.
He shook his head and walked onto a small stage in the pub. Holding onto a microphone as he began to sing.
"And I’m always where the sun dont Shine. The tears don’t show Won't hurt me now 'cause heart's Been broke. I hate myself but it won't show
I constantly lose all my remorse." He sung in a beautiful voice. I could feel the lyrics..
He continued his song of sadness and I listened to every word and felt every word.
When he was done he hopped off of the stage and approached me as I stared in awe.
"I know what its like to be sad. And i know when someone is lying too." He said.
"Why do you care?? You don't know me.." I whispered.
"I care because I know what its like... You should get home."
"Jahseh I--" "Dont... Call me that." He snarked.
"Damn, sorry.. Can i at least get your number..?" I asked, gulping.
"I don't know you, why would I give you my number? You could be a serial killer for all I know" He mimicked me, smirking a bit.
I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, Bye X." "Goodbye Sorrow." ___________ Two weeks later
I was walking to school, the same usual route i took every single day.
"Hey fuck face!" A voice called out.
Fuck.
I didn't reply, walking a bit faster, pretending not to bear anything.
It was her, I knew it was her. I could hear her footsteps behind me clapping against the pavement as she ran to catch up to me.
She finally did, tearing the hood off of my head and spinning me around to face her.
"We had sex last night." She taunted and winked.
I could feel the stab in my heart once she said that, feeling the tears prickle in my eyes.
"Are you sure you're ready..?" He asked me caressing my face. I nodded. "Are you sure you want to?" I asked gulping. "Only if you want to baby.." he whispered.
I smiled when he called me baby. I loved when he called me that.. "I do.." I spoke... "You'll be my first and last baby... I promise.." He spoke. I smiled so hard at that. "Promise..?" I asked. "I promise baby, you're my forever and that'll never change, of course you're my first and last. Im gonna marry you beautiful.." "You'll be my first and last too... I love you.." "Hellooooo, fuck face, wanna hear the details...?" She smirked.
"Leave me alone, Jeniffer..." I choked out, holding in the tears.
"Aw, come on... The more you hear the stronger you'll become.. Besides I'm not sure why you care you cheated on him anyways."
Thats when I snapped. "I NEVER FUCKING CHEATED ON HIM! HE JUST ASSUMED AND NEVER LET ME EXPLAIN! LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE I HATE YOU AND I HATE HIM AND YOU BOTH NEED TO GO DIE!" Breathing heavily the tears began to fall.. "I never fucking cheated.." I whispered.
She let out a throaty laugh. "Keep telling yourself that princess. You're a whore and everyone knows it you thot."
She began to walk away, taking another route to school. I was glad for that. ___________ This has one read aw, but thats okay, writing this honestly is really helping me cope with some things and sort of let it all out in this book...
Welp, you guys are slowly getting to know the main character better and sort of get an in depth look on why shes sad and all.
Im trying to squeeze X in here as much as I can and stuff.. Just haven't figured out exactly how...
Excuse any mistakes 💖
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