Forgetting Love

20

A few hours pass, and Chris never leaves my side. He's treating me like a china doll, like I could break at any moment. For once, I don't mind it. Dinner has already passed, and there's still no sign of Danny, Joseph, and Jonathan. It's actually kind of peaceful with them gone.

"Can we go outside?" I ask randomly. I'm sitting at the table while Chris is cleaning up. He refused to let me help. I mean it's sweet and all, but I can still do things. It's not like it will hurt me or the baby.

"Why?" He asks.

"It's just been so long since I've been out there. I just want some fresh air."

Chris contemplates for a few seconds before saying, "Now isn't the best time. We can go out as much as you want once the guys get back."

I almost forgot that we were docked. I could be seen. "Oh, ok." Escape is so close, but I couldn't even if I tried. Chris won't leave me alone for even a second. That's probably the reason why.

He sits in a chair next to me and takes my hands in his. He plays with my ring. It's been a long time since I've seen this sweet, caring side of Chris. It's reassuring to know that he's not all bad, but it scares me at the same time. I grow more comfortable with him each second he's here. It's wrong, I know, but I can't help it.

Stupid hormones. Yeah, it's the definitely the hormones, another part of myself whispers in the back if my mind. I shake it off and silence the voice.

"So what do you want?" He asks staring at my eyes. They're so beautiful and powerful. He could change the world with them if he wanted to.

"What do you mean?" It's sort of a vague question; limitless actually. I want many things. Some more than others. I could go on forever about what I want, but I doubt he'd want to hear all that. He'll need to specify.

A small smile dances on his lips and humor shines through his eyes, probably from my obliviousness. "Do you want a boy or girl?"

My cheeks burn and I can't help but smile. Blonde moment, of course he was wondering that. "Oh, duh," I laugh trying to hide my embarrassment. "I guess I want a girl." I shrug. I don't give him any reason, but it's a good enough for him.

"I was thinking the same thing," he says with a big smile. "I wouldn't mind a smaller version of you running around." I look away from him. I still can't imagine that. It hurts too much to. I still don't want this, but I can't change it.

"Oh, well in that case I want a boy," I try to steer his attention away from my sudden change in mood.

"Why?" He asks confused.

"Because I was a little brat," I joke.

"You couldn't have been that bad," he laughs.

"Oh my gosh, I was terrible," I gush. "Since I was the only girl, my Mom spoiled me rotten. I thought I was a princess among frogs. The frogs being my brothers." Thinking about my younger self brings a smile to my face. Things have changed so much. I've changed.

Chris finds this hilarious. I join in with his laughter. "Care to explain?" He asks.

"Before meeting Ryan, I was a little, well, a girl-"

"Wait," For a second I'm scared that he's mad at me for mentioning Ryan, but his face says otherwise. "You, a girl? No." Chris says sarcastically.

"You know what I mean," I say feeling sort of relieved. "I wasn't the tomboy I am today. I was the 5 year old that wore dresses everyday and always had a big bow in her hair," I start.

We spend most of the evening telling each other our misadventures we had when we were younger. Chris doesn't care if I mention other guys which surprised me. I thought he would've been jealous or something. It's a nice, carefree way to end the day. For a few minutes, I forget all the bad things Chris has done and see him as a regular guy. He's really easy to talk to, and his smile is contagious. For that small moment, I see us as friends having a good time.