Astrid wakes up in the warmth of her room- memories of falling asleep on Jason's shoulder fresh in her mind as she sits up in the dark of the midnight fallen room.
She rubs her eyes tiredly, looking around before her eyes land on Jason curled up on the couch.
She once loathed to admit how cute he looked when he slept but she didn't mind as much anymore- in fact, she quite liked having him on her mind.
She watches the way the slight cracks in the curtains that expose the moonlight softly streaks across his face— and she wonders if perhaps in another life he could be a model if he'd wanted to pursue it enough.
But that just wasn't Jason.
The Jason she knew was very much a home body- only he hadn't found his home yet.
He had awful unforgiving parents and a rough childhood, but somehow, he still came out as the sweet and tender boy she loved so dearly.
She wraps her duvet around herself, taking a few steps nearer to his sleeping form.
He was so young when he slept— well, he was young as it was, but it was as if something had aged him in his seventeen years of life.
Quietly, Astrid walks over to Jason, crawling under his arms that seemed to be positioned perfectly for her body as she covers them in her floral duvet.
Jason hardly stirs— perhaps a nose twitch or a flutter of the eyelid- nothing of which she had seen.
He just wraps his arms around her a little tighter— though his arms are still heavy with the drowsiness of sleep.
"Astwid?" He murmurs, voice heavy and she can practically see the pout on his lips- though her back faces him.
She hums lightly, and he continues— Cheryl had told her that he slept talked when he was restless, and it was best just to let him fall back asleep.
"I wove wou," His voice is just above a whisper, grainy and groggy but she still smiles at the sound.
And then his head falls softly against the crook of her neck as he breathes deeply in and out against her soft skin, fast asleep once more.
And softly, Astrid whispers back, feeling as if it were a secret she had shared with only him, "I love you, Jason Blossom."
•••
When Jasons blue eyes flutter to an open, he's immediately greeted by Kevin and Alexander staring at him.
What has he done this time?
And then he realises where he is— who he's with.
Astrid lies in his arms, his face is in the crook of her neck, the arm that's beginning to numb from being under her wrapped around her waist, his other hand draped over her head, fingers tangled in her long locks and she sleeps.
He moves his head slowly, glancing around to see the blanket draped around them wasn't there when he fell asleep.
He blinks, clearing the blur from his eyes, slowly moving his arm from her head, untangling her messy strawberry locks from his fingertips as he bites his bottom lip, trying to be quiet and precise in his movements.
Jason glances down and realises just how close he is to her— that is not a thing he was expecting to wake up to.
"I-Is it getting warm in here?" He stutters our as they watch his breaths start to labour, "And is it just me or is the room spinning?"
He's starting to struggle now, his arm stuck under her waist— he didn't want to wake her but if he didn't he might start sobbing in the middle of the room.
"Jason?" Kevin asks lightly.
But Jason isn't paying attention, he's to stuck on trying to pull his arm out from under her waist.
Every part of him was shaking now and it was just getting harder to move his stupid arm.
Astrid's eyes flutter open and she can feel jason trying to slip his arm out of her grasp, and she scrambles off at once watching as Jason pushes himself up off the couch bracing himself against the wall, his entire frame moving with deep breaths.
They watch in fear, scared that he'll sink to the ground and into a full blown panic attack but he slowly manages to pull himself out of it, hands shaking lightly as he turns around to face them.
Astrid takes a step towards him, and he shakes his head— her feet immediately stop, murmuring softly, "I'm sorry— I shouldn't have—"
He shakes his head, rasping out, "It's okay," with a small half smile that doesn't reach his eyes attached to it.
His hands sink down to his knees as he tries to steady his breaths.
She feels her heart break, she shouldn't have done that— or she should've warned him first.
But because she hadn't he was on the brink of a panic attack, painfully pushing the anxiety down before them.
It takes him a long time to catch his breath before he finally stands himself up straight, breaths calmer than they were but heart still racing beneath his facade.
He sees Astrid looking down at her feet ruefully and he immediately feels awful— he wants to wrap her in a hug but he's terrified.
"I—" His voice is croaky and rough, "I'm going to splash some water in my face."
He brushes past them and into the bathroom and they hear the faucet, before he shuts it off and presses his back to the door still not in their view as he closes his eyes, pressing his hands to his face.
Why couldn't he just be normal?
He slides down to wrap is arms around his calves, resting his chin on his knees quietly, letting out a shaky sigh.
This was going to be a long day.
•••
Jason and Astrid sit in the backseat of the car on the way back from the therapists office.
Jason's eyes had been red and blotchy when he'd come out of the bathroom— everyone could see it and even he'd known that but no one had said anything about it.
But now he sits the furtherest he can without jumping out of the car from Astrid and her mother, glancing out the window and not daring to say a word.
"Jason, honey?" He turns to Emilié Rosebud as she speaks, "Are you alright?"
He nods softly, murmuring with a few cracks in his voice, "I'm fine."
"Are you coming back to ours or would you like to go home?"
And for the first time, despite Astrid's pleading look, Jason murmurs softly, "My House, please."
And if Astrid thought she'd had her heart broken before, she was extremely mistaken.
YOU ARE READING
Crestfallen » Jason Blossom. #wattys2018
Fanfiction"I haven't seen her smile, since the day of the accident. Jason, you are our best shot at ever getting her to talk again. She hasn't talked in two and a half years, and I heard her laugh when she was with you, do you know what that's like for me?" ...
