Asexual ✔️

4

Jesse Metcalfe everyone aka Giovanni. Okay you may begin reading.

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Last night was a waste of her time when she could have been in the comforts of her loft and warmth of her sheets.

"We could have been chilling last night, right girl?" Remy licked at Violet's opened palm before rubbing her body against it.

When Kat and Nate called she came up with a story about her becoming sick and rushing out before getting the chance to tell them that she was leaving. She felt bad for lying to them but she didn't want to explain the truth.

Her phone's ringtone resonated in her loft, breaking her from what ever trance she was in. She tore up her bed searching for the small rectangular device before noticing its glow downstairs.

"I'll call them back later," she groaned laying back down.

The ringtone blared again. Facepalming and feeling annoyed, she ran to retrieve the device.

"Hello," she answered without checking the I.D.

"Ms. Strong? It's Giovanni. I just wanted to sincerely apologize for last night if I made you feel uncomfortable or came on too strong. Can I take you out somewhere? Your choice, sí?"

"Gio..can I call you that? Please there's no worry really I-"

"I don't take no for an answer Ms. Strong. I'll just keep coming to Sofia's ballet classes and ask you in person."

Well when he puts it like that what other option did she have.

"Meet me at the bakery not far from the dance studio." And with that she hung up the call.

When she walked in, the familiar bell dinged above, she already spotted the tall figure before she entered. He was sitting at a table close to the big window with his back facing her.

"Hi," she tried greeting him camly. What do you say to a guy you basically rejected, find attractive but just not in the way your body would allow?

"Hi."

"Before you start a speech let me just say this. Last night you did nothing wrong. I would have enjoyed it if I could. So there is nothing for you to apologize for. It was me not you."

"What do you mean you would have enjoyed it if you could?" Gio frowned and his face scrunched up in confusion.

Well shît. This was what she dreaded.

"I'm sorry if you don't mind me asking...are you a lesbian? Because if you are that's totally fine and in that case it would be my fault because I sho-"

"I'm asexual." Violet's eyes closed as she spills the beans. Beans that have been cooking in the pot for years, they were starting to burn.

"Come again," Giovanni speaks after a moment of silence. "Asexual? What is that?"

And then came the dread of describing what it was and what she felt.

"It's when someone never feels sexually attracted to someone or never have sexual desires." Violet explained and then turned to wave someone over from the counter. She's gonna need some strong coffee or something stronger if she's going to have this conversation with someone she's barely hanged around.

"Can I have light roast coffee?"

"Yes, ma'am and for you sir?" The lady taking their orders did a double take and just had to perk her chest up and out more, swing her ponytail over a shoulder, and drop her voice a couple octaves to achieve that sultry affect.

"Cinnamon tea with one teaspoon of cream please."

"Great. I'll be right back."

"I suppose you want to know more," I sighed.

"Yes but only if you want."

Her secret was out now no need to close up and turn back around. Violet bit her lip and ushered her coffee to roast faster because this was about to get personal and awkward.

"When I see a guy I think is attractive, that's all they usually are to me. I never fantasize about being in bed with them. I never feel sexually aroused by someone. To put it simply, my body avoids anything sexual like people want to avoid a plague."

Violet could tell he was processing the information, wanted to ask more but didn't want to be too invasive. And so when the lady came back with two hot steaming mugs she found the strength to say her next words.

"I can tell you have more questions. Ask away," she nodded when he stared, as if to ask if she was sure.

"So if you don't feel anything sexual. Are you a virgin?"

"No. I've had séx. Not the best but it has still happened unfortunately."

She took a sip of her coffee and smiled into the mug. Watching him look puzzled every other minute was actually becoming amusing.

"I've never actually came," she explained further. Somehow the words that she thought would never leave her mouth just flowed so easily around him. He was curious but wasn't judging and gave her the confidence to tell him more if he'd listen. "I, um, may have faked it all the time."

He almost dropped his tea and waste its remnants right where the sun didn't shine.

"They must have been horrible."

"I thought that too. But it happened too many times for me to keep the blame on the guys." She giggled, feeling free from the burden of hiding that secret from everyone.

It felt relieving to release that tension that built up in her and now she saw that all she needed was someone to listen. And actually it worked out that it was Giovanni because he didn't know her well and she didn't know him. Plus Sofia's mother would probably be the one bringing her to class now, meaning she really didn't have to see him again.

Sometimes you need to tell your pain, sorrow, and secrets to a stranger, if they are willing to listen of course, because if they judge it wouldn't matter considering they would never see you again and you'll just keep telling yourself that they barely knew you enough to judge anyway. What ever you reveal to them is just one little thing that makes you, you. They don't get to see the full picture of you. So they only judge based off what they were told.

It's different when you try to open up to someone who's known you for most of your life and they judge you because you're not the person they thought you were. It hurts more because they get the full picture of you everyday and yet they still let the one thing you tell them change their entire view of you. Their minds already have a set image of how we are or suppose to be, so when we turn out to be different they not only hurt you but you hurt them as well.

"Did I answer all of your questions?"

"Not exactly. Though I don't think I want to ask my last question."

"Aw, c'mon."

Giovanni regarded Violet and sipped the last of his tea. "I know I can pleasure you. The question is will you allow me, piccola?"

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Giovanni would have caught these hands.....and then I might have allowed him. 😐