Blue Ice | Larry Stylinson

*XXII

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"Chuck," Louis sighed, as soon as he accepted the call from the pub owner. He knew he would have to talk to him and explain everything, even though he didn't really need to make any excuses for himself.

Chuck didn't speak for a few seconds, "Louis, it's so nice to finally hear your voice after all this time." He felt guilty hearing how hurt Chuck sounded, but he knew he couldn't avoid this conversation for much longer.

"Yeah," Louis said, "It's been a while. A lot of things have happened and some changes since the last time we saw each other."

"Really? I don't really want to have this conversation over the phone." Chuck said breathlessly, it was as if he knew what was about to come.

"I think it's better this way, believe me. I feel so guilty." Louis sat down at the kitchen table. It was raining outside and he could hear the droplets pelting against the kitchen window.

Chuck didn't speak for a few seconds, and Louis didn't blame him. He blamed himself for bringing Chuck into this mess. Chuck had been such a good friend to him, he could be a little pushy at times, but still, Louis didn't blame him.

He knew that if he had been in Chuck's shoes maybe he would have done the same. Louis' marriage was so miserable and he felt helpless, so Chuck would have felt the need to save him.

"Why do you feel guilty?" he asked sadly. Louis' heart broke again. It was as if Chuck knew what he was going to say, and was waiting for Louis to confirm it.

His finger made a few patterns with on the kitchen table, trying to come up with the best way to say that what was happening between them couldn't happen anymore. Nothing seemed good enough.

"Harry and I...uh... we've decided to work it out." Louis winced when he said it. He didn't really know what to expect, waiting in anticipation for what Chuck's reaction was going to be.

"Have you?" It came with a snort, and then a chuckle escaped his lips.

"Yes," Louis continued. "We went on a honeymoon and we talked about it. I suppose you may think that I'm stupid for doing this, but it's what I chose to do." Louis finished confidently of his decision. He didn't want to hurt Chuck further. He didn't deserve it.

Maybe if Harry hadn't approached him in the shower on their honeymoon or asked for forgiveness he would have tried to take things further with Chuck. However, Chuck does have a special place in his heart, but only as a friend. No one could take Harry's place.

"Louis, I don't think that was a very wise decision. You better than anyone knows how much Harry has hurt you!" Chuck spoke harshly, enunciating each word.

"Yes, I know how much Harry has hurt me, you don't have to repeat it. There are things that have happened between us as a couple that will always remain between me and him. Please, try and respect that," Louis pressed his lips together.

"Don't make me laugh for God's sake. He will never change. He will be the same asshole that he's always been." Chuck's voice came out in a rush, sounding as if he wanted to make up Louis' mind and make him see reason.

"Look, I didn't want to tell you this way. It's the worst way possible, but I need to focus only on my marriage," Louis pressed.

"What about us, then?"

"There never really was an "us" Chuck. Nothing really happened between us. A kiss does not make a relationship. That's all it was. One kiss. That's it."

Chuck went silent, but he didn't end the call either. Listening to each other breathe for a little bit. Then Chuck sighed.

"If that is your choice, then I will respect it. As you said, you know better than anyone why you are giving Harry another chance."