I See You | あなたが見えています | 《 Joji 》

Part 15 - Why?

I slowly opened my eyes.

Darkness was the only thing I could see.

I started to feel with my hands. A warm body was being pressed against me. I could hear his soft snore, his arm wrapping my waist. His hairy legs covering mine, he was keeping me warm.

I felt sleepy again all of a sudden. But the dream was starting to make me feel more awake.

It felt so real...

The guilt,

the sadness...

they were so real.

I can barely tell the difference.

After remembering every detail, I cried yet again. I'm really sorry for waking up. I'm so sorry Joji I had to leave you like that. I'm just so sorry.

I felt George moved and he heard me that I was crying. He let me go of his arms and removed my hands that were covering my eyes.

"Are you awake the whole time?" He asked with his sleepy and heavy voice.

"N-no, I just had a bad dream. Haha..." I laughed at myself.

George leaned closer and kissed my forehead. He looked at me with sleepy eyes and he held my face as gentle as he could.

"Don't worry Ann, I'm here. You're not alone anymore. I'll hug you as tight as I could just to make you feel safe." He rubbed his thumb against my cheek and I held his face.

Even though I couldn't see his face clearly, his face looked...

sad?

But why?

I'm not really sure but I can feel it.

He pulled me closer to his chest, stroking my hair and kissing my head. Making me feel as secure as possible.

Honestly, I couldn't ask for more. His love is all I could take. His existence, his happiness.

Him.

Nothing else.

But why?

Why are you hurting me in such a way?

The moment you said you weren't Joji,

I was somehow broken.

It felt you weren't true.

It felt it was a lie.

うそつけ

But somehow I just can't seem to hate you. I can't hate you.

You're everything to me.

So please be true to me.

I shook my head, trying to get rid of those thoughts.

Damn.

Damn you..!

Damn these thoughts!

Everytime I get so happy why does my mind have to ruin it for me? It's not my fault but why am I overthinking?

"It's gonna be alright." George whispered. As fragile as he could.

I paused.

"How did you know I was..?" I was in shock too.

How did he know something was going on with me...

"You were so quiet." He answered

Just like I said back in the train station...