SDMN Oneshots

Lifeboat - zerkstar (platonic)

"You don't deserve to live. Why not kill yourself?"

"You're gonna die alone."

The phrases whirl in Vik's ears as he runs away from Simon, his vision blurring, the blue lockers aligning the corridors moulding into a constant streak.

He knew he made a mistake, getting mixed up with that group. Look where it's got him now.

His best friend is dead, and the last guy he slept with killed himself in a gay suicide pact with his best friend. That really paints him in a good light, not to mention he's failing maths, and his depression is really hard to handle at the moment.

That's not a surprise really, considering everyone around him is fucking dying. Death isn't supposed to be commonplace in high school, high school is the period of your life you're meant to look back on, cringing at who you were back then, the way you dressed, how much of a dick you were.

You're supposed to make it past high school, supposed to have a life beyond it, but that doesn't feel like an option anymore.

As Vik flies through the school corridors, he carries his antidepressants in hand, rattling in their little tube. He comes to a stop in a classroom, and collapses onto the floor, curling in on himself, hugging his knees to his chest, attempting to get away from the world.

Maybe if he curls up tight enough, he thinks, he'll implode, and disappear from the universe. Create a time vortex, something like that.

In the quiet of the classroom, it's still too loud, still too crowded.

Who the fuck gave Simon the right to commandeer this school, talk to him like that, especially after JJ committed suicide, or so they were told, it seems a bit more suspicious than that. Why would JJ give up the opportunity to swan through his high school career, untouched, just like that?

There's something odd about it, and Vik can't put his finger on it.

Having said that, it was important that his face would be in matching halves if a meat cleaver was taken down the centre of his skull, when he first 'befriended' Simon and JJ.

What the fuck kind of social situation did he get himself into? This school is so fucking weird, Vik muses to himself.

He knows he's weak though, knows that without JJ, there's nothing to prevent Simon from ruining him. It's not social suicide, but social euthanasia, since Simon's helping him do it.

Vik knows he's falling away, slipping out of reality, trying to keep his head above water. Simon's already thrown him overboard, and he can't tread water for much longer, no matter how good a swimmer he is.

The little tube sits between his knees, facing him. Staring at him, calling out to him. His breathing is fast, and he shakes violently, rocking back and forth in his curled up position. There's still about 20 or 30 pills left in that little tub, noisily moving about in their confines as he swings like a pendulum.

He's going to do it.

Moving to cross his legs, feet both tapping frantically against the floor and his kneecaps as they judder, on edge. His shuddering hands meanwhile attempt to open the container, and they can't. Not with how short his nails are, or how unstable he is, or the speed of his movement.

"Stupid child-proof caps!"

That's also not helping him prise open the tube, he thinks.

God, Simon was right. He's such a fucking baby, he's useless, and can't do anything by himself. Without JJ, his high school career has no purpose, Simon doesn't like him anyway, and he wishes things could go back to the way they were before, before everything happened with Josh Bradley and the weird new kid.

Although, Josh is a nice guy, he's just in a relationship with a weirdo who fired a blank on school property in the school cafeteria. On his first day.

Once again, how the hell did Vik's school end up like this?

Vik's stuck in his own thoughts, trying desperately to pull the lid off of his tablets, when the door flies open, and he looks up. Standing in the doorway is Josh, his eyes wild and panicked.

Immediately, his eyes fall on Vik's medication, and he falls to his knees, snatching them out of Vik's hands, pressing the cap fully back on before he lets the drugs roll away across the floor, grabbing Vik's waist so he can't crawl after them.

"Shhh, it's okay. It'll be alright, stop struggling." Josh speaks with his voice level, firmly holding onto Vik, who is currently trying to pry Josh's hands off of him, unsuccessfully.

"Thank fuck you're okay. I heard what Simon said from some random girl in my maths class." Vik winces at the mention of maths. Now really isn't the time. "He's a dickhead, and not telling the truth at all, Vik. You're the only one out of that group who's actually nice. JJ, even if he's dead, was a prick while he was alive."

"Breathe, okay? You're staying with me and Ethan for the rest of the day." Vik wrinkles his nose, out of reflex. Ethan isn't the kind of person the social radar would place him with, but by this stage, he figures he's got nothing to lose.

Only if Ethan is willing to spend time with him though, after some of the things he's said, trying to gain Simon and JJ's approval.

Vik knows he's fucked up numerous relationships, for the sake of popularity, so he won't fall below the radar himself, and end up being bullied, or picked on, the same way people like Ethan are.

Like Josh was, before his mix-up with JJ and Simon.

He stops struggling, and falls limp in Josh's arms, crying for forgiveness from all the people he's wronged. Josh coos at him, and gently runs his fingers through Vik's unkempt hair, mussed up from his fingers pulling on it.

Maybe, just maybe, there's the chance of atonement, reconciliation for his sins. Josh can offer the opportunity for Vik to find real friends, people that actually care about him, care about his mental health.

Josh seems to be doing that right now, and maybe Vik can grow as a person, with Josh's help.

Author's Notes
Hey guys! This is based on the musical adaptation of the movie, Heathers. You could call it an edgy Mean Girls, I guess? It's funny as hell but also got a lot of problems going on too.

Definitely worth the watch, and the musical is equally as great a listen (I fully have a crush on Barrett Wilbert Weed?? Look at her 😍)

Anyway, I finally made myself a Sidemen twitter account! I'm @burrzerk, if you fancy coming to say hi (I'm desperate for friendship lmao)

I'm not too sure about this fic, so please let me know if you think it works. It's really a stream-of-consciousness third person narrative from Vik for most of it, with Josh coming in at the end, rather than a zerkstar oneshot.

Vik is Heather McNamara, and Josh is Veronica Sawyer. Simon is Heather Duke and JJ is Heather Chandler (don't ask why, it just happened).

💙😊💙