SDMN Oneshots

The Limits of Comedy - StepheNE

Sometimes falling in love with people isn't a good idea.

It happens, time and time again, and we can't avoid it, which is the worst part of it.

Love is so expensive, so commercialised, and people lap it up. They devote so much of their time to it, watching it unfold on TV, in gossip-mags, and when they don't get it they write the relationships they want to see for themselves, through fanfictions.

All in all, love is so easy to build and obsess over, but it's also so easy to lose, or break.

That's why Stephen hasn't let himself fall in love. He's a pessimist at heart, he always has been. Pessimism and mockery being the primary instincts of comedy and all that.

You can stop yourself from feeling sadness when you push happiness upon others, and try and maintain that steady high for yourself, the highs of good friendships and nothing more.

At least, that's what he tells himself, on those lonely nights staring up at the ceiling. Those lonely nights listening to nostalgic mid-2000s songs. Those lonely nights rewatching Horrible Histories (which in all honesty is a pretty good night in, he just wishes there was someone to share it with sometimes).

So he tells himself that every little low he feels when he's single is okay, because it's nothing amassed to the feeling of missing what you once had.

But that pessimism is getting harder and harder to keep up with.

Each time Will smiles at him, laughs wholeheartedly at his jokes, acts even slightly protectively of him (or even jealous of Stephen's friendships with others), Stephen feels his heart melt a little.

He's quite a soft individual anyway, and Will's not helping that, fuelling his ego and spurring his jokes.

Catching eyes with Will is always one of the worst decisions he can make. It becomes too intimate, and Stephen feels trapped. He's claustrophobic, breath catching and holding him tight in Will's metaphorical grip.

He hates every minute of it, because it goes against everything he stands for.

So each time Will laughs, smiles, makes eye contact with him, blue eyes gleaming beautifully, speaking louder than any sentence every could, Stephen suppresses his emotions. He smiles with his eyes cast down, and averts eye contact sooner rather than later, dejected crystals burned into his mind.

But he tells himself that it's better like this. It's better in the long run, that he doesn't push it any further than this. He doesn't want to lose Will's friendship, and taking this anywhere beyond that is a surefire way of doing that.

He simply bites his lip and looks down, face reddened and smiling.

Author's Notes
Hey guys, sorry I haven't been around much. Lot of revision and such, now I'm in the a-level run up (save me). I've also got a thing in the works that's on about 3000 words at the moment, and may take me a couple more months to complete. I hope it'll be worth it, though probably not lmao

This is very VERY unedited, but I hope you enjoy this angsty trash. It's also for the wonderful ravenclaw_scar for getting me inspired with some of this ship. Lot of love for her, check her works out if you haven't already!

All the best

💙😊💙