Once upon a time there was a lil' ogre boi, the lil' ogre boi was named Shrek. At the time, Shrek was blind to the fact that he was the DADDY of the universe. Shrek has just been sent away by his big ol' ogre parents. His parents had made a huge mistake by sending him off, for when the Shrekoning takes place they shall be left behind. Anyways, Shrek traveled miles before he found the perfect home, his swamp. Shrek spent many years in his swamp, so many years he is no longer a lil' ogre boi, he was a big ogre daddy. ;^)
Shrek was happy in his swamp. All the villages feared him, so there was no one to bother him. Shrek enjoyed being alone, though he got lonely sometimes. Sometimes the Bad Boy Teenager Club would trash pass in his swamp, Shrek didn't like this. One day, after Shrek took his daily mud bath, the Bad Boy Teenager Club tried to steal his shoes. This made Shrek very SH00K. Shrek grabbed one of the boys with his big ogre hands *mmmm* and snapped him in half. This wasn't hard for Shrek since he was so strong. The rest of the boys stared in horror as Shrek growled at them, "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SWAMP, YOU IGNORANT SHIT SPONGES!" Shrek was truly angry since he truly treasures his beautiful crocs.. The rest of those lil' shits ran in terror and never returned.
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The Holy Bible of Shrek
Non-FictionThe official bible for the Disciples of Shrek. Written by the Shrek Meme Dream Team "Another Layer of Heaven." Religion: Shrekism.
