The Holy Bible of Shrek

lOrd fUckwAd (best read in a Scottish accent)

Okok-- soo Shrek and the hOtey Donkey went to Lord Farquads castle kingdom place thingy. Fagwad is vury lonelay and he wanteded a princess so he no die virgun. When Shek walkeded woth thee donkey to farqauds castile thingay Farquad sayed them to save Fiano the oogaly princess in the towerer guardeded by a dragoon. Ya see, fagquad trieded to save multiple princess', but they all calleded him a faget and no marry him. Fiano was the only princess left, for al the other's were cunts. 

After the oogrey lefted, Farquad realized he likeded Shek. He wanteded to sek sheks  dek.. *mmm* Fagquad realizeded that he was no str8, he was a fagit. He wanteded to tel Shek how he feeled, but it was too l8, fo Sreek had already leaved with DONKAAY. Farwad was depresseded, so he cuted himserlf. cri cri ;---;