ABANDON

Chapter 11 -- A fearful fool, a self proclaimed dufus, and a mute

    Jane stood in the doorway of the cockpit, looking out over the moving masses.  She felt separate from it, but in this she was satisfied.  At least that was what she told herself, for as much as she wanted to be separate forever, there was an equal part of her that longed to be part of the mess.

    It wasn't hard to find Ibber and Jane found Harris right beside him.

    "I don't know about you, but I can't wait to get out of here."  Harris said. Jane agreed.

    "And that's another thing, I hate being cooped up."  Harris continued. "Nothing but dust in the lungs and aches in the bones.  I've got to be out there, you know, doing something.  Or sleeping, you know, give me a few years in hibo and I'll take that, but waiting around, that's the end of my list, the gunk at the back of the barrel, the last breath in a windstorm.  Pathetic, really.  And do you know what else is pathetic."  Harris took off his right boot.  He took off his sock and ripped off a plastic patch from the bottom of his foot.  He wiggled his toes vigorously, when he saw Jane watching him he stopped mid wiggle.  "What?"  he asked.  "I have Raynauds in my feet, heat is what I need.  Soft and constant, you know what I mean?  I'm not taking any chances.  Do you know what Raynauds can do to you?  I feel it already, this place is cold."

    Ibber put his helmet on.  Jane couldn't see his face through the darkness of the helmet.  Not that being able to see his face would have changed anything; he was unreadable.

    Jane took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.  She told herself her feelings were unreasonable.  What was there to be nervous about?  She scolded herself for being childish.  Then she followed Ibber's lead, putting her own helmet on.  They each carried a pack with a portion of sourdough bread, a capsule of water, and a standard toolkit. 

    Ibber pointed to his helmet while looking at Jane.  Then he made his hand into a constantly talking mouth. 

    "Oh."  Jane realized she could hear nothing.  She took off her helmet and Ibber took a step towards her, but Harris stopped him.

    "I got it.  I got it."  He waved Ibber away.  "Always ready to help the new guy. Especially when the new guy is a gal."  Harris laughed at his own joke.  Jane felt him brush back her hair and then she heard a click and a pop, and then her ears were filled with voices that weren't hers.  Jane put her hands over her ears.

    "Too loud!" Harris yelled. Jane flinched. Harris was much louder than the comm. "But not that loud eh?"  Harris waved Ibber away again.  "I got it.  I got it. How's that?"

    "Team five, we need you at the door."  Jane heard Faringoth's voice.  "Perfect." Jane replied.

    "Yeah, I may be a dufus, but I know a few things."  Harris slapped Jane on the back. "You're good to go."

    Jane joined Ibber who had a pistol in a holster in each hand.  He handed one to Jane, who reluctantly took it.  He strapped the other to his waist.  Jane didn't know what to do.  Should she copy him, or was hers different?

    "Where do I put it?"  Jane asked.

    Ibber looked at Jane and then walked off.  Jane stood there wondering what had happened. She was glad she was wearing a helmet too, it prevented them from seeing the feelings she was incabable of hiding.  What a team they made: a fearful fool, a self proclaimed dufus, and a mute.  Survival was becoming harder than she first thought. She strapped the holster around her waist.  When Harris joined them at the transport door, Jane noticed that while his holster was strapped around his waist, Harris kept his pistol in hand.    

    "What is this?" Harris held up his weapon.  "Have you ever seen a gun like this? Where were those other dudes going—ballet practice?"  Harris shook his head.  "It's embarrassing.  To be rescued along with the pipsqueak squad."