Lost Love

Harsh Memories

"in order for one to get stronger they must face their past. so today you will be reliving whatever memories it is that's holding holding you back." everyone stiffens and shuffles nervously. "even though it may be those memories that are pushing you forwards it is also those memories that are pushing you in the wrong direction. i want you to get rid of whatever hatred you are holding on to and turn it into determination."

"and how are we going to be reliving thease memories?"

"there is a spell that i will cast on one of you at a time. you will be able to watch these memories and i want you to harness your emotions. only once you have done that you will have passed and moved on."

Rouge went first then Sting, when both snapped back into reality they where shaking and looking quite angry. Auma instantly made a noise of disprovement and moved onto Levy who did not look very confident.

"are you okay?" i asked her one she had come back to reality.

"fine" smiling unconvincingly she dabs her eyes.

"Lucy?" Auma turns to me , its my go.

"Just close your eyes" straightening my back I close my eyes. Almost instantly i fall into the trance, under a spell.

I was not prepared for the reality of the whole thing. I can feel and hear everything. It's like I'm
truly still in the moment.

 "Your so pathetic" Natsu sneers. It's the same moment from when I got my scar. "I don't know why I ever called you a friend"

 "Natsu, don't be so kind." Erza smiles.

 "Yeah your right. You don't deserve to be a part of this strong guild" fairytail had never been one for only wanting strong wizards.

 "You should just kick her to the curve Natsu" Lissana smiles with her hands on her hips. in this moment i have never hated her more.

it's so much like the real thing that everything comes crashing back to me, all of the feelings that i had build up inside me.

"you maybe onto something there Lis" I know it's coming. But for some reason my arms and feet won't work. I can't move out of the way no matter how much i try to move. The shove causes the breath in my lungs to leave me. 

I hit the bar. This time there's not shock, Only pain. My arm snaps as I fall to the ground. I must have been to surprised to have noticed that when it happened the first time. The glass falls and i can watch it as it moves through the air before it shatters on my shoulder. i open my mouth to scream but nothing comes out.

 everything goes black for a moment and my senses come back to me as i am brought back to reality. Gasping I put pressure on my shoulder The feeling tingling under the skin even though there's no wound.

 "Are you okay Lucy?" Levy gently places her hand on my arm and I flinch away. my arms are shaking and i half expect to see blood seeping through my shirt.

 "Fine" I rasp removing my hand from my shoulder.

 "Interesting" Auma mused studying me.

 "A little warning would have been nice. You didn't say that I would feel everything to". Glaring at her I blink away the tears.

"so did any of you manage to control your emotions?" we all look down. "very well then, we will keep on doing it." she turns to Rouge and he sighs.

before long we are starting the cycle all over again. if they can do it then so can i, seeing that memory only made me more angry. 

"anger can lead you down a bad path, don't let it take control" even though she's taking to Rouge i feel that that was meant for all of us.

when it comes to my turn again i'm prepared for whats to come. this time i don't focus on whats happening part of me knows that its a memory but no matter how much i tell myself it i cant pull away.