Rupa Book 1 | ✔️

June 5th • 8

- Can I do It? -

Monday

June 5th, 1995

Dear Diary,

This morning my father came up to me and handed me a photo of a boy and said, "This is my friend's son" and he left. Without seeing the photo I went up to Papa and told him that I don't want to get married. 

He didn't say anything. Dadi came and I snuggled her while crying, I am only 17, it's not even legal in India to get married at this age. "Shut up, your going to get married and that's it". Why, won't he understand, I didn't do it and didn't let that driver carry on either. He thinks I'm the one who didn't it. Dadi told Papa but he didn't listen to her either. 

I ran outside in the howling wind. I had just finished 12th and wanted to become a doctor, to save people's lives. But, I wish Dadi didn't stop me from committing suicide, it would've been better than this. I want to give that exam and get the scholarship to become a doctor but now it feels like a dream will become a wish and just like a wish in sometime it will fade away.

I went back to home determined to let go of my dream and say yes to the marriage. But when I reached home Dadi told me she had persuaded Papa to postpone the idea but if I don't get the scholarship he will get me married. And he won't support me financially either, I have to do all on my on. With watching the stars I thought can I?

Good Night, Diary