Try Me | klance

《18》

remember those trigger warnings in the author's note? yeah. you should go read those again.

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     The stars were white specks in the moonless night. Sounds of cars driving past filled the calm air. White blinds open, revealing the sleeping town. Everything was what Keith wanted to feel. The moment was ethereal.

     Keith sighed. His bangs plastered on his forehead with sweat. He should be sleeping.

  Instead, he is awake remembering the ghosts of his past.

    •               •                 •                   •             •

   His first foster parent had been a divorced, white, hardcore Christian woman. He had been ten. He had lost his father two years ago to a fire.

    It was in these six months that he had stayed with her that defined a great part of him.

    The woman was mostly gentle. Forceful at times, though.

    "C'mon, Keithy. Let's meet your new siblings. They're going to be your best buds. You better play nice. I don't raise bad kids. But I can tell you're not a bad kid." She whispered, and Keith felt saved.

     "Are you sinner? No? Then you're coming with me to church. Don't think that just because I'm not your real mother you don't need to obey me. Don't look at me like that, don't be difficult." She said with a stern voice while gripping his wrist fiercely and pointing a long, red nail at him.

      "What are you doing, Keithy? Wanna help me plant some carnation flowers? You know what the red in the flowers mean? Love. I love you Keithy boy. I hope nothing comes between us." She said with a smile full of straight white teeth, her gloved hand on Keith's cheek was rough.

     "Truly. Why do they feel the need to- to kiss each other in public? Two men kissing is just utterly unnatural. God." She gagged, slightly covering up Keith's eyes, pulling the rest of the kids away from the sight.

    "Keithy, would you like to go to school? If you pray to God, maybe you'll make friends. It'll be nice. You'll learn something for once." She said in a way that left no room for excuse, and Keith believed her kind smile.

     "Do you think I have time for your needs? I have four other children to maintain. You're not the only one that matters. You are a guest in this house. You don't get to ask for favors." She huffed as she turned away from Keith's growling stomach.

      "Stand still. Don't get into fights with other children. Be kind. Remember the Lord's words before making any decision. Pray when you need help. It is only your first day, be careful." She smiled proudly, brushing Keith's bangs gently away from his eyes.

        "Pack your bags, Keith. I'm done with your difficult attitude. After everything I've done for you. You think anybody else wants a gook for a child? Your parents are nothing to me. You don't deserve my love. You're just like him. Goodbye." Her face was passive and uncaring, perhaps a bit annoyed, as she left Keith at the broken home full of lonely children.

   And here the cycle began.

    •               •                 •                   •             •

   Keith sighed. He hated nightmares, but he hated them more when they were about his foster parents.

     He hated how they kept him away from his sleep. It had been a long time since he had had nightmares about them.