Hold You Down

Chapter 22 - Rides

After they got out of their session, Veronica was feeling frisky, watching Archie get jealous was something she never thought she'd wish for, but after feeling like he was icing her out, this felt like a small step toward the old Archie, her boyfriend.

As they got into the car, Veronica stared at her boyfriend lovingly, "thank you Archie, for coming today, I love you so much" she says, hoping that he'd sense her honesty.

He looks at her almost in shock, but then smiles, "I love you too Ronnie" he says, giving her a peck on the lips.

He felt bad about how much Veronica had been taking responsibility for, especially today during their session.

His heart broke because he knew that she still couldn't see herself the way he saw her. To him, Veronica was the most amazing person to have walked the earth, but sadly she never felt good enough, and as the therapist had alluded to, Veronica would continue being deceitful, closed off, and afraid until she could learn to accept his love, and love herself (more importantly).

"I'm sorry this is so hard, we don't have to mention Reggie or the pills if you don't want to? We can just focus on us in these sessions?" he offers, hoping to ease her guilt a little.

For the first time since she had gotten back two weeks ago, Archie was starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

He would hate to admit it, but the therapist had helped them significantly.

He needed to hear Veronica speaking candidly about her reasonings for hiding the abortion, and what Dr. Wasser said had reminded him that she's been broken and hurting for a lot longer than he has.

"Arch... that's a very selfless offer, and I love you for trying to protect me, but we have to get past this somehow?" Veronica says, once again being impressed with her boyfriends ability to care for her.

Veronica watches him nod, his heart also breaking at the mention of it, "I know I've said it a million times Archie, but I'm so sorry for lying to you and cheating on you, I don't think I'll ever forgive myself... I can't even comprehend how you can still love me at this point... I need you to know that I will never do anything to ruin us again, I can't live without you" she tells him softly, feeling very vulnerable. 

Her tone is honest, but meek because she's still scared to hand over her heart, but the thought of loosing Archie makes her desperate to prove herself to him.

"I still love you because you're incredible" he says trying to calm her down, noticing tears starting to form in her eyes. 

There's a small sparkle caused by the water on her lower lid, Archie wipes the forming tear and leans into her "don't cry, you're beautiful" he says as he presses his forehead to hers.

Veronica shuts her eyes hard, letting the tears escape.

Her breath tumbles as she tries her best to allow Archie's comfort, but still she feels guilty.

"I don't deserve you" she whispers as she holds his face close to hers.