A Life Beyond (Hard Time Series Book 2)

Her Fears

LENA POV

"I think all we can do is just try babe. If the judge decides not to allow us to adopt Callie she can change her last name for the time being and we try again." I said sipping on coffee as I could see the stress on my wife's face for this last few days had been particularly trying. I also had been nervous myself for I couldn't help but wonder if  Mike was going to have Stef arrested for spitting in Judy's face. The woman had it coming in my eyes but I reminded my wife we had to be careful. We just did for any little mess up or report to our parole officer and it was back we went and that was no an option.

"I know baby. I just want this for her and she wants it so bad." Stef said smoking her cigarette as I piled some eggs on a plate walking toward her.

"And she will get it. We will try baby." Smiling at her I straddled her lap as we sat at our tiny kitchen table and I felt her hands gently rub up and down my thighs.

"You are so loyal baby it's crazy."

"Why wouldn't I be.  I fell in love with you baby and I keep falling in love with you. I hope you know that. This is the life I dreamed of with you. You know so many of those nights when I would lay beside you in our cell I dreamt of a home, our home and I had no idea what it would look like or where it would be. But this is it. And I love it because it's ours and we are working hard for it."

"Yeah. I dreamt of this too and yeah I fall in love with you  more and more everyday myself.  I hope you know this is it for me. That there is no one else I want in this life and that I am committed to remaining out of jail."

"I know you are baby. You don't need to reassure me of that.  You show it in your actions and everything you do. Each and everyday." Smiling once again at her I fed her some eggs as her smiled widend.

"I love you Lena."

"I know you do and I love you too sweetheart." Leaning in I softly kissed her lips as I felt hers gently press against mine. "You know I don't think we should go to that party at Mike's unless we try to make peace."

"Make peace? Is that a joke?"

"No. But maybe you should take Miss Rose up on her offer. If not he will try again to adopt them."

"I told my son I'd handle it baby. It's not something he wants. Jude does not want it."

"I know he doesn't and believe me I don't think it's right what Mike said to you. You know I don't and its unfortunate that he doesn't see what you are doing and trying to do. I can't understand it for the life of me. Ok maybe it wasn't good what happened at the arcade or what Frankie said maybe was not the best. And I think we can show them better ways to express themselves right?"

"I'm not allowing them to get kicked around Lena."

"I didn't say that honey. You know I didn't. I just meant they can stand up for themselves however using different words and different tactics."

"Len this is the only way I know baby and no I don't want them being suspended or getting arrested. Of course not. And I know Frankie does nearly everything I do."

"Yes she does and Jude is not far behind. And baby I am not saying you are a bad mother. Never. Ever would I say that. You are an amazing mother to all of them. Even Callie wants to be like you but the both of us behaved a certain way in Chowchilla. Right?"

"Yeah."

"Ok so maybe we can talk to them and come up with another way they can defend themselves beside threatening to choke people to death or rip them in half." I laughed as she laughed herself. "Listen I will never change who you are because this is the person I fell in love with and the person I will always, always be in the love with no matter what she does. And I know you are one tough woman who does not fuck around and that is one thing I really love about you. The level of protection you provide all of us and the loyalty you show consistently. Those kids you have they are the same way. I mean I wasn't happy with what Jude did but whatever those boys said about me he wasn't having it. But being that protective and loyal can serve him well if he shows it in another way or controls it to a certain point so that he doesn't get arrested."