needed you.

Sanbi

We were on a mission to capture the Sanbi. This reminds me of Rin, so maybe I'll be able to not focus on Deidara.

At first we went to get some dangos. I played the dumb act as usual till' the dangos were finished. Deidara seems really interested in seeing my face, I don't get why, I shouldn't be important to him. Another thing that happend at the dango shop was that, I made him mad. Really mad. I made a bad joke about his artwork. He got really mad. By the time we left the dango shop, he was still mad at me, I could tell by the tone of his voice and the look in his eyes. I decided the find the Sanbi on my own.

I felt bad for what I did. Really bad. He must've been so upset. He must've wished that Sasori was there to understand him. I mean, he's an artist, he loves art, of course he'd get mad if someone insulted his art. I want to apologize. I'm so mad at myself. I can't believe I made him mad like that. I'm so stupid.

Anyways, we meet up again, not far near the lake where the Sanbi is. I told him some things that I heard. Hopefully it's useful, hopefully he'd forgive me. He seems to already have already, I figured when he smiled at me when he saw me again. I felt my face turning red. His smile, it's adorable, it's so sweet. It makes me wanna see his smile over and over again. It gives me this feeling.. not good but not bad either. I love it. I love seeing his smile. It brings such joy to me.

That aside, we were catching the Sanbi. He tested my abilities. Too bad I had to hide the abilities, it would've been funny to show off to him like that. I acted as if I couldn't do anything at all. I just stayed there acting as if I'm drowning, just to see if he'd save me to see if he cared. Guess what? He did. He cares. He got the Sanbi also. He brags about his artwork. I made a simple joke, guess what? He got mad again, but not as mad this time.

We were flying on one of his creations. I kept thinking about him, how he saved me, his smile, his joy. Soon I started getting dizzy. I fell asleep. I fell asleep thinking about him. Soon, I heard his voice. He caught me sleeping and blew me up to wake me up. I didn't realize I slept. It felt kinda nice to have him wake me up. Hearing his voice first thing when I wake up is one of the best things that could happen to me.

Afterwards, we took the Sanbi to the desert and he started to walk off.
"Senpai! Senpai! Where are you going?" I obnoxiously yelled.
"Piss off."
He seemed mad...? I don't know what. Was it my fault? I'm overreacting. Maybe he's just upset about something. I should just leave him alone.

Today was fun though. I want to apologize for all I did to make him mad, but I can't. I just can't say it in front of his face, I don't know why. I am truly sorry....I just..

Nevermind.