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I sat up for all of three seconds before I had to lie down again. My head was spinning. I'm supposed to start work today, so I pried myself off the couch and squeezed my eyes shut to try and curb my dizziness.

I had a few days to explore the city... I know only how to get to the bar and back.

Which, if you haven't picked up on it yet: One too many drinks the night before is clearly my problem here.

I honestly just wanted to go back to sleep, but I knew better than to skip work on my first day. So I made my way to the bathroom, splashed my face with some cold water and stared at myself in the mirror.

"What are you doing, Shawn?" I muttered to myself as I tried to fix my hair.

I hadn't talked to anybody at all since I called Cory a few days ago. I got several messages, from Cory, Meg, and Angela, and Topanga too. I've just been way too distant to even care about messaging anybody back.

***

You probably want to hear about how work was and everything. Since that's kind of what this whole thing has been about. Shawn and his new job, right? Wrong.

At this point it's just Shawn surviving, and I'm not exactly sure how long it will last.

Meghan bought me a journal to document my life here. Well this is what it looks like so far:

October 12th, 2017 8:36pm

That's it.

That's all I've written.

Why? Because trying to channel my thoughts long enough to write anything meaningful hurts. It hurts so much.

I didn't only dive in way over my head with this, but I don't know how to swim, either, so I'm drowning.

I want what I want, yaknow? And this is what I've always wanted. To be something big, to do something big.

You know what the biggest thing I could do right now that would leave an impression on everyone who knows me. Just one step off the balcony-

Knock, knock, knock

My train of thought was (thankfully) cut off by a knock at the door.

I walked over and undid the chain lock and opened to door. Expecting to see Meghan standing there with a huge smile across her face.

I was wrong.

On the other side of my door stood a blonde girl with kind eyes and a soft smile.

Her smile was merely her lips curling up at either side. If I didn't know that smile personally. I wouldn't have thought she was smiling at me.

"Hi." The girl spoke gently.

Meg's friend. Duh. I wanted to smack myself upside the head. I could not remember her name for the life of me.

"Hey." I stepped out of the doorway to invite her in.

"No it's okay." Her feet didn't move. "I just wanted to ask you- if you're not busy..." her eyes focused on her twiddling thumbs.

"Yes?" I tried to push her to continue.

"Meg and I, and a couple more of our friends are going out to eat tonight and I just wanted to know if you wanted to come."

"What kinda food?"

That broke the ice.

The girl busted out in a laugh.

...I'm not that funny.

"Oh we were thinking maybe some Japanese food, then maybe we'd go to the mall or something." She was looking at me now. Her eyes didn't waver from mine

I really appreciate that, when someone makes an effort to keep eye contant. I respect that a lot.

"Are you asking me out?" I joked with her.

She giggled and twirled her long blonde hair around her finger. She's definitely gorgeous. That's for sure.

"Well?" I flipped my hair and leaned against the door frame for dramatic effect.

"Yeah I am." She answered casually.

I was taken aback by her boldness. I almost accepted her request.

But Angela.

"Look," dang what is this chicks name? "I'm sorry, but I have to work in the morning and I probably should get some sleep, yknow?"

"Oh.. yeah of course. Another time?" She asked with a full smile. Beautiful.

"We could probably work something out sometime."

"Okay cool! Can I get your number?- actually nevermind I'll get it from Meg. Have a good night, Shawn!" She walked off and I closed the door.

She's cute. I'd give her two weeks.

***

I researched flights... I was determined to get Cory out here... at this rate it would take me just a few weeks to get him out here.

Unacceptable.

Not soon enough.

I need him and Angela and Topanga like right now.

"When did I become so reliant?" I wondered aloud. I used to be such a lone wolf. Now I'm not really surviving much without my people. If it weren't for Meg I'm not sure if I'd be doing as well as I am. (I'm not doing well, mind you, but it could be worse).

The best time for Cory and them to come out would be during winter break. But that's not for another month and a half...

Well... looks like I'll have to go visit them.

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