05 | Sensible Heart

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Ji Eun waited until we were back at the dorm to tell me anything else

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Ji Eun waited until we were back at the dorm to tell me anything else.

She put down her bag and sat cross-legged on my bed while I sat down on the stiff chair at my desk, gripping the metal edges so tightly my knuckles turned white.

So what if someone from his family was a mender? It had nothing to do with me. It was not going to affect me.

"I don't know who in his family is a mender, alright? I just know that someone from his father's work found out and his family got so scared they moved away."

"So why would he come back?" I said, with far more force than intended and Ji Eun jolted in surprise, not used to me raising my voice. "His family stayed over there in Busan, he's the only one that moved back to Seoul. I really don't know why. Maybe he missed Tae?"

Maybe, or maybe he wanted a better education? Yeah, right.

I stared at the carpeted floor, completely lost in my own thoughts. My own memories.

"Why are you so interested in why Jimin moved and came back anyway?" She said while glaring at me, rotating her jaw. Ji Eun caught me off guard and I really had no immediate answer. I just gawked at her with my mouth open, willing words to come out. "Is it possible that maybe that block of ice you call a heart, has finally defrosted?!"

I swiftly grabbed an eraser from my desk and threw it at her, thoroughly offended by her remark. Leave it to Ji Eun to lighten up the mood without even trying.

"Excuse me!? I've had a few crushes before! I just don't see the point in liking someone when we're going to eventually get burn marks anyway."

"You do understand you need to know people in order to get a burn mark, right? You only know me and Hoseok and we both have burn marks!" She exclaimed.

"Ugh... It's not that I don't want to get to know anybody. I just don't particularly feel like getting close to anybody anymore." Ji Eun stood up from her position on the bed and engulfed me in a hug. "I can see it still hurts you, I can see it in your eyes. You keep saying you'll tell me someday, but it's been more than five years, Yuri. You have to start letting people in. You can't live your life isolated like this."

I can.

"You can trust me."

I want to.

She came out of the hug to look at me in the eyes, and I felt my throat close up; not allowing any air to fill my lungs.

I couldn't tell her. No one needed to feel sorry for me.

The burden I carried was mine alone.

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"We took her in because we thought she was normal and could give us a semblance of a typical family! Now we have two kids who are a danger to our lives. What the hell are we supposed to do now?"

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