Chapter 12

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My whole being had been worn out

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My whole being had been worn out. I felt barely alive. It was worse then death. I had to still fight. I hated it. They held my family and my friends over me. I felt like I was a puppet. I felt idiotic that I  couldn't figure anything out. 

Someone sat next to me. It was my lycan. "You hurt me mate. And him. The darkness is growing, and it will overpower my fondness for you soon little one. I will be the darkness. Be careful, and I'm sorry." He left and a while later I heard his howl. It hurt because I couldn't even be a good mate.

I don't remember it clearly; my mind and my body both wandered around. But I made my way to the library, I still didn't know where my room was. I sat on the rocking chair huddled up. Amongst all this I had let down my lycan.  

My mind was still in a haze but I remembered feeling disempowered when the castle guards grabbed my arms and  forced me to the cells. Everything was cyclical. I was returning back to the beginning. No where near close to the truth. One step back again. Nowhere close.

I did not let them drag me, instead I walked with them soundlessly. I was conscious but my mind could just not even focus on anything. It's just like your eyes, sometimes they just cannot focus on the words in a book. I let myself be cuffed, even though I could have easily overpowered the guards. Although, I was glad to realise that the cuffs were not coated with wolfsbane. I sat there, and felt like I had reached the lowest point in my life. All that remained was how to get up back on my feet after this - both literally and figuratively. 

Three days went by without was food or water

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Three days went by without was food or water. My throat restricted. The thirst caused my throat to ache. My mind and thoughts prevented me from sleeping. I worked up questions, the main ones being: "Where were the daste witches now?" How were they still alive? "What did they want from me? "Where is the dagger?" "I hadn't found the weapon, or had I? "What was my 'quest'?" "What did I have to do?" "Did I have to kill?" "How do I actually get rid of the mark?"

My wolf then propped up the question - "What about my mate?"

Immediately, my thoughts were cut off, my senses sharpened and I was alert.  Something growled in the shadows. I could barely make out Xavier, who stood there in his human form. His claws were retracted and they slashed the stone walls leaving marks and making loud sounds which caused me to noticeably flinch. Then he stood silently in the darkness.

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