Chapter 8

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Tripp

Fleeting images of Lexi looped through my memory as I packed my duffel bag. The idea that I would be so far away from her is gut-wrenching. I shouldn't be thinking about her, I need to focus on work and the imminent meeting with what I can only consider to be a shady client. I finish packing and just as I'm about to leave, my cell rings.

"Mr. Conway, do you need anything for your trip?

"Who is this?

"It's Kevin, your assistant, sir."

"Oh... yeah, you can call me Tripp. Mr. Conway is a little too formal and I would like a low fat, caramel latte with cream."

"Yes, sir. I'll see you at the lake house sir... I mean Tripp."

I shake my head, I know he's just doing his job but, I feel like having a personal assistant is just going to be an added hindrance. Grabbing my jacket, I head toward the garage door but, I stop short, dropping my bag on the floor. I feel reluctant to go on this trip and it isn't just because I suspect illegal activity. Leaving Lexi without telling her how I feel or at least saying goodbye feels wrong.

On the way to the lake house, I'm debating whether I should see Lexi. My nerves feel frayed and I'm nervous about seeing her again. Would if she's mad at me? What if she never wants to see me again? What am I doing? This is crazy. I pull into a gas station, parking my Harley at the pump. I bought this bike because of Lexi, I remember how she was always going on about how hot I would look, especially with her on the back. The look on her face the first time I rolled up to her driveway on this hog was priceless. I remember how excited she was when I handed her, her own helmet. We rode out into the countryside; taking the backroads to avoid traffic. I remember how I fucked her on this bike under the sunset. Distracted by my thoughts I hadn't realized I was spilling gas all over the place.

"Sir...are you alright? A young woman asks.

I don't even notice how pretty she is, even though she's standing there; the breeze billowing her blonde hair, exposing her long neck. Quickly, I snap out of it, stopping the pump.

"Uh... yeah, thanks. Must have fallen asleep or something." I lie.

"You sure? If you're not up to driving, I can give you a ride to wherever you're going."

"I'm sure, I'll be fine."

"Ok." She looks disappointed but manages a smile before getting back in her car.

I reciprocate the gesture out of kindness. There was once a time when I would have jumped at the chance to sleep with her but, not anymore. Grabbing a few windshield towels, I begin wiping away the spillage. I'm starting to feel nervous again about seeing Lexi. There is a part of me that secretly hopes she isn't home and another part of me that is desperate to see her.

Rolling up in her driveway, I turn off my bike and throw the kickstand in place. I'm parked behind Lexi's car, which means she must be home and suddenly I can feel the butterflies floating around in my gut. I walk up to the door and ring the bell; waiting impatiently. I wonder how she will react to me being here. Will she slam the door in my face? Will she hug me? Or will she glare at me with those electrifying blue eyes of hers. She doesn't seem to be home, maybe she's with Parker and Leanne. Then again, she could be with that Dylan guy. They could be on a date right now, he could be touching her, kissing her... Stop! Stop! Stop! I must stop assuming that she's with someone else.

Walking back to my bike, I realize this could be an opportunity for me to walk away from my demons. I lean against Lexi's bumper, contemplating my options. Glancing at my watch, I notice the time. I still have a couple hours before I need to meet with McAllister, which would give me plenty of time with Lexi; if she were here. I figure I'll give it a few minutes, if she isn't here soon I'll have no choice but to leave. A couple minutes pass by when I notice a familiar jeep slow down and pull into the driveway. Parker is behind the wheel and he doesn't look happy, Leanne looks like she wants to jump through the windshield and choke me. The back door opens, and Lexi gets out. I watch as Parker and Leanne back out of the driveway, glaring at me the whole time before disappearing down the road.

"Why are you here? She asks.

"I'm leaving, and I felt it was important to tell you something."

"You already left."

"Yeah... I know, and I feel horrible for leaving you the way I did. That's why I'm here now... to tell you how much I love you and that I'm ready to be in a relationship with you."

She looks pissed, shit. Did I just fuck things up? Did I say something wrong? I thought this is what she wanted?

"Now? Now you love me? Now you say you are ready to be in a committed relationship? What took you so long? You're a big idiot." She swings her purse at me, I duck, and she misses.

"I'm sorry, ok."

"NO! it's not ok. Nothing is ok anymore. Do you know where I was just at? Do you?

I shake my head no. I had no idea she would be this upset. There must be something else going on that has compounded the issue.

"No, I don't. What's going on Lex? You can tell me baby, I'm here for you."

"Don't call me baby! You lost that privilege when you left me. You want to know who was there to pick up all the pieces? Dylan. He was the one who supported me and comforted me and now he's in the hospital and he may not live." She says as she breaks down in tears.

My heart suddenly aches when I realize how upset she is; that I'm partially responsible for the pain she's feeling. She seems to care a lot about this Dylan guy and I may have to come to terms with the fact that she may be in love with him.

"What happened? I ask, feigning concern over Dylan's welfare.

She doesn't say anything to me, she's on her knees sobbing uncontrollably. I bend down and put my hand on her shoulder but, she shrugs me away.

"Get away, you don't care about me and you certainly don't care about Dylan." She says through her tears.

"I want to be here for you but, you have to let me in Lex. I came here for you because I love you and I don't want to lose you. Seeing you like this makes my heart ache. What can I do? How can I help?

A few minutes pass by and I'm starting to give up. I don't think she wants me here and I'm thinking maybe I should just leave and give her the space she needs. Maybe if I'm lucky, she will change her mind. I grab a pen and a piece of paper from my duffel bag and scribble my new number on it, passing it to her but, she doesn't take it. I crouch down to look her in the eyes but, she looks away. Sighing heavily, I place my number on the ground in front of her. I don't want to leave her like this but, she refuses to communicate with me, so I really don't have a choice. I mount my bike and I'm about to put my helmet on when....

"Why did you really come back Tripp? Why now? She asks, her face still red from fresh tears.

"I told you why... I love you and I want nothing more than to be with you."

"It's too late Tripp, I'm in love with Dylan. He's the man I want to be with."

Her words cut deep, it feels like she just tore my heart out. I try to play it off and stand my ground stoically but, when I look into her eyes I can tell she means what she said. I nod at her in response, then place the helmet on my head. The head shield is up, and I can still see her.

"Ok. Just know that however much you love this Dylan guy, I love you more Lexi. So much more that I am willing to give up everything just for you."

I watch her expression but, she doesn't seem impressed. I flip my shield down; flip my kickstand up, gazing at her one last time before I roll down her driveway and out of her life again.

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