11 | WHAT WAS I EXPECTING?

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There are only four days left and I don't know if I feel happy or miserable. These are supposed to be two completely different emotions, yet I manage to feel them both at the same time.

I got up in the morning to find a message on my phone from Archer which made me feel complete bliss and excitement for today's date. After all we've been inseparable the last few days and it almost felt strange when I opened the message only to see that it says we couldn't hang out today.

So now, half an hour later, I'm sitting in the living room, eating ice cream and overthinking.

Is he already bored with me?

Are we done after only a few days?

With a sigh, I realize that even if he decided to end things now, I can't judge him or be angry. I dont have the right when I know myself that this relationship was doomed from day one.

My phone suddenly rings next to me on the couch, reminding me that the outside world still exists and I shouldn't drown myself in ice cream, trying to eliminate everything else.

A small smile creeps on my face, even if I'm in this crappy mood, when I read Stella's name on the screen.

Taking no time to answer, I pick it up and press the green button. "Hey there."

"Hi, Jordan!" I can imagine her smile on the other end of the call. "You completely disappeared the last few days and I got lonely without my best friend to gossip with."

I feel a sudden pang of guilt somewhere deep in my chest when I realize that I've been spending every living moment with Archer and completely ignoring everything and everyone else. Stella has always been there for me, especially at the times when I would go to her and complain about my biggest problem in high school, which pathetically enough, was Archer Finn. Now that I've solved it, I completely forgot about her, my head wrapped in thoughts about my one week boyfriends and his adorable big brown eyes that-

"Helloo? Earth to Jordan Blue? Are you still there?" Stella tries again, the irritation obvious in her voice. I take a deep breath and shake out of thoughts about a boy who is definitely not as important as my best friend.

"I'm here, sorry Stella. I was just daydreaming." I murmur, trying to keep my voice cheerful although I know I dont succeed by the long sigh I receive from the other side.

"Are you still going after Archer like some lost puppy, Jordy? You've been obsessing over him for far too long, it's time that you put yourself first. You deserve way more than this stupid player-"

"Um, Stella, I am kind of dating that stupid player."

There's an awkward pause that makes me even more nervous. I don't know what her reaction will be, yet I have the bad feeling that she doesn't appreciate that revelation. "Be in Bayley's in twenty. We'll talk there."
And with that Stella ends our call and I am left blinking in confusion and worry.

Groaning at the inconvenience of having to get up from my safe spot, the couch that is, I climb the stairs and after rummaging through my closet, I walk out with my pair of ripped jeans and a crop top that is something way out of my comfort zone. I contemplate changing but one look at the clock is enough to tell me that I should already be on my way to mine and Stella's favorite cafe called 'Bailey's'. I run for the door and put on my vans on my way out. My most comfortable shoes that I only wear when I know I'm being late.

It takes me half an hour to get to Bailey's and when I arrive I immediately see my friend's purple locks and I smile at her to which she replies with a wave. Strange. She is usually all smiley and happy, but right now she seems to be anything but this. In fact, she reminds me of me and my constant mood, which is really, really bad.

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