Hold On (I Still Need You) // muke

chaprer six

Luke shifted uncomfortably when he woke up to an empty bed, and he reached an arm out to feel around for his boyfriend. He furrowed his eyebrows when he didn't feel him and then forced an eye open. He wasn't there.

"Michael?"

He sat up and then looked around the bedroom, finding that their bedroom door was still closed from when they initially fell asleep together. The man never remembers to close it if he's just getting water or a midnight snack.

He stood up and then turned to the bathroom after he turned the light on, finding yellow illuminating around the door. "Michael? Are you in the bathroom?" He asked but he didn't get a response.

He walked to the door and then twisted the doorknob, only for it to be locked. "Mike?" He knocked.

No response.

The shower wasn't running. His phone was on the dresser. He should be able to hear him. Why wasn't he answering?

"Michael!" He called as he knocked one more time on the door.

His heart was racing, beating a million times a second as his fingers went numb from the cold and the pressure of his banging.

"Michael, answer me!" He yelled as he hit the base of his palm against the wooden door again.

His stomach was dropping. He felt like he could throw up any second as his mind went to the very worst case scenario.

"Baby, please. Are you okay? I need to know." He continued while he pressed his ear to the door.

Silence.

He took a deep breath and then jiggled the doorknob a couple of more times. "No. No no no no no." He repeated over and over as he knocked and knocked again, and again, and again.

"Michael, I'm gonna break this door down if you don't answer me. Tell me you're okay, please." He could feel his throat closing, but he forced the words through regardless. "I need you to t-talk to me. Mikey..."

There was a rattle on the other end and he let out a breath of relief. His anxiety didn't waver however. He knew something was wrong, and he knew he had to get into that room. "I know you can hear me. Talk to me. Put whatever that is down down and talk to me." He begged.

His legs felt weak beneath him and he curled his hand into a fist as he heard his boyfriend's voice come out in a broken tone. It made his heart break into a million different pieces. "I'm sorry."

"No. No, don't say that. Listen, open this door, Michael. We can fix this. I believe in us. I believe in you." Luke rushed as he looked around his room.

"Let me go, Luke. You don't need to hold on anymore." He heard his weak voice and Luke ran his hands through his hair and he felt his heart in his throat. He was choking now.

He wasn't letting go. He wasn't letting him give up on himself. He wasn't giving up on him.

"No. No, Michael, you can't do this to me." He shouted as his voice shook with fear. "You can't leave me alone. Don't you do this to us. Don't you fucking dare so this to me, to us."

He didn't get a response and he pushed his hands against the door to feel how thin the wood was. "I need you!" He banged on the door before taking a deep breath.

He backed away from the door and then rammed his shoulder into it. He grit his teeth in pain, letting out a quiet groan before doing it again. No amount of pain could compare to the ache in his chest as the seconds ticked by one by one like a timebomb. Time was running away from him and he didn't care if he dislocated his shoulder or hurt himself trying to beat the clock to get to his boyfriend. He was going to get this door open. He was getting to Michael.

"Mikey, don't do this. Please don't do this."

He rammed his shoulder harder into the door, even if a numbing pain blossomed like a flower in his bones. He felt the door cave in from the pressure and he shoved his fist into the dent before tearing a hole into the wood. He threw it on to the floor and then reached for the other side of the doorknob, immediately twisting the lock so he could finally push it open.

"No..." He trailed off as he saw his body laying on the bathroom floor.

He fell to his knees beside his lover and then held up the empty bottle beside him, too busy crying to properly read whatever it was he took. He threw the container at the wall and then cradled him to his chest as tears fell like waterfalls from his eyes. He couldn't breath. He couldn't feel. Everything was stopping. His world was crashing and burning right on top of him and he couldn't think straight. All that was in his head was 'no no no' and 'Michael Michael Michael'.

"No!" He sobbed as he shook his boyfriend's stagnant body. He held his face in his hands and then picked his wrist up from the floor to shove two fingers against his skin. He was so cold.

"Stay with me. Baby, stay with me." He pleaded him before looking around as he felt the faint, almost non-existent pulse. "I'm getting help. Just hang in there. Please."

He jumped on to his feet, failing ridiculously, and then forced his body to carry him to the dresser to he could get ahold of Michael's phone. He didn't stay by the bed however. No, he crawled on his hands and knees back to Michael and then pulled him against his chest as the phone rang and rang.

He could see his teardrops falling on Michael's skin and he whispered prayers to Gods and Deities that he didn't even know or believe in to help his lover. He couldn't leave him. He couldn't die, not now, not before him.

"911, what's your emergency?" He finally heard after what felt like hours.

"I need an ambulance." He rushed in one breath. "I-I need an ambulance my boyfriend he-he-he-"

Luke was choking as he pulled Michael chest to chest against him. His body was hanging limp and lifeless in his arms as he squeezed his eyes shut, praying that this was just some sick twisted dream. It had to be. This wasn't real. It couldn't be.

"Sir, calm down. Tell us your address. Deep breaths."

There was no calming down. Michael was dying, and nothing anyone could do would calm him down.