here is to the home i never had
to the restless vibes
that made me sad
here is to the place where pain always hides
where hurt is the only presence
that dwells in my mind
here is to the home i never had
where pain is peace
and tears collide
here is to the home i never had
where hurt is alive
and happiness dies
here is to the home i wish i had
where life always lives
and never dies
here is to the home i prayed to have
where tears were wiped
and hearts were glad
to be alive
here is to the home i dreamed to have
where love was true
and insults died
here is to the childhood i wished i had
where i made daisy chains with the friends i wish i had
here is to my childhood
that never bloomed
where tears where normal
and my young heart broken
here is to the childhood i never had
where i wished i had smiled instead of cried
where insults were compliments of my empty eyes
here is to the death i wished i had
where peace remained
and my heart stayed sad
here is to the death i wished i had
where tears were rain that doomed the sky
here is to the life i wished i had
where smiles were radiant
and frowns always smiled
here is to the tears i drowned in
pain i lived in
hurt i dreamed in
here is to the life i never had
where i would always smile and never cry
here is to the freedom i wished i lived in
where i spread my wings of pain and hurt and enter the sky
of empty life
here is to me
but not my family
here is to the love i lost
that left my soul also lost
here is to the heart i gave away
never to return any day
here is to my broken body
full of scars
and cuts that became too bloody
here is to chocolate
that helped me forget the lies and pain
but got me worse and worse everyday
here is to the friend i wished was glad
who wished me happy
yet i always cried
here is to the love i never had
the love that made me feel wanted
yet instead made me feel hunted
here is to the world i wished i lived in
the pain i cried in
the love i lost
and the non-existent trust
the world is just not for me
i'd die
but i'm already dead inside
i'd cry but i'm too empty
i'd laugh but for no use
i'd live but I've already lost my bitter battle
won no war
fought every fight
but killed in combat
i'd heal my scars but there was too much of bloodshed
i'd live my life
i just never felt like it
so i'm sorry i'm not perfect just please let me be
and lastly
here is to my apology
i shouldn't feel the need to apologise
but i do
so don't blame me
for the hurt i bring it's not my fault I've changed
and i'm sorry i changed
but you changed too
i'm sorry i don't love you
or any one
i'm sorry but it's true
