the marriage (john shelby.)

Twenty Five.

♚

Amelia felt sick. Right through her whole body. She wanted to throw up. She could still feel the handprints all over her chest and between her legs. She wanted to bathe in acid. She wanted to climb out of her own skin. But she just sat on the sofa, chewing her fingernails and trying not to cry. She didn't even want to cuddle her baby because she didn't feel clean enough to hold her.

John was angrily on the phone in the kitchen, screaming at Tommy. The whole fight between gangs had just become extremely personal, Sabini had sent one of his henchmen to fuck over John's family.

Michael was sat opposite Amelia in the living room, watching over the disheveled mess. He had tried to make conversation and offer her tea, but all she did was stare blankly at the wall as tears rolled down her cheeks and landed on her lap, causing a damp patch on her skirt.

Her porcelain white hands had been stained with crimson from the splash back as John beat up the main, dotting her skin in a morbid polka dot pattern. Her face was blotchy and pale, whilst her hair was knotted at the back.

John shoved the door to the living room open and ran a hand through his hair as he stared at his wife on the sofa.

"Michael fuck off. You've done your bit." He instructed.

Michael reluctantly agreed, acknowledging that he was not in a position to overstep the line. He sent Amelia a small smile of sympathy, but she couldn't tear her eyes away from the wall.

John carefully sat down next to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pressing a kiss to her temple. She tried to push him away as the voices in her mind screamed at her, but her body was so exhausted she accepted it, bursting into silent tears.

They sat there for a moment, a moment in which she felt almost safe again. In her own house, with her husband who could skilfully defend her, as he had proven. She sobbed so hard that her body was convulsing, but John didn't care. Nor did he care that his shoulder was soaking wet. He didn't care. He was just glad she was alive.

"You're such an idiot Amy. How do you get yourself in these situations?" John asked rhetorically as they sat together.

What was meant as a throw away comment soon turned into a remark that Amelia took the wrong way. She shot up from the sofa and exploded in his face. much to his shock.

"You think I wanted this? That I asked for this?" She screamed.

"Am-" John began but was quickly cut off by his wife.

"Don't you fucking 'Amy' me!" She shouted so loudly her voice was raspy. "I never asked for any of this to happen."

"I never said you were. Just be careful out there. Be aware." John calmly replied, trying not to heighten the situation.

"Be careful? I should be able to walk down the fucking street without someone trying to rape me!"

The loud screaming and shouting from Amelia had managed to wake up her oldest daughter. Katie was stood at the top of the stairs in her pyjamas, eavesdropping on the scene.

"I can't help the fact that my business means you're in danger!" John was now shouting too as he became fed up with being reasonable and his temper was beginning to show.

"I don't want to be involved in your business, I just want to be your family! Leave me out of the dodgy deals you're up to."

"They're intertwined and you know it!" John argued back.

Katie was terrified. Shed seen her parents bicker and snap at each other, but shed never seen them scream in such a way. She rarely ever saw her father angry, and Amelia was usually the epitome of calm. She wanted a hug from either of them but knew it wasn't the time.

"You don't tell me anything about business." Amelia seethed.

"Like you just said, you want to be family not business." John childishly argued.

"Like you just said, they're intertwined." The two of them rowed and rowed.

Dan had come round for his early morning cup of tea, letting himself in through the back door. Hearing the shouting, he entered into the living room carefully, but neither John or Amelia noticed that he was there. Dan saw Katie crying on the stairs and rushed up to see her, before taking her back to bed and calming her down.

John and Amelia had to pause the argument as Ciara's crying interrupted them. Amelia rushed upstairs and picked up her baby, completely forgetting how disgusted she felt as her maternal instincts took over.

However, as soon as she set foot back in the living room, the arguing started up again as John tried to apologise for his comment. Amelia's head was all over, and she couldn't properly process everything that had gone on in the past hour. Ciara was resting against Amelia's chest screaming her tiny heart out as she begged for someone to pay attention to her.

"Ciara for fuck's sake, shut up!" John screamed and kicked the nearby table over as he reached boiling point.

Suddenly the baby was quiet, and Amelia stopped talking. John took deep breaths as he paced around the living room. She had no words. John never shouted at his kids, especially a baby that had no concept of what they were doing.

"Get out." She whispered.

"Fuck off." John dismissed her orders.

"I mean it." Amelia used up her last bit of energy and confidence. "Don't you dare shout at my daughter like that. Get out."

John stared at his wife in disbelief, as if she had 3 heads. Never had he been bossed around by his own wife. Her stubbornness and determination was what he fell in love with, but now he was resenting it.

"She's my daughter 'n all. All those kids are mine, not yours." He whispered in fury.

"And until you treat them, and me, with a little more respect, get the fuck out of my house John Shelby."

For once in his life, John realised that perhaps it was time to do as he was told.

♚

a/n: she's updated!! there's probably gonna be a time skip soon because s2 is so hard to fit amelia into, just thought i'd warm you x