Beauty behind Madness **Discontinued**

Five

"Beauty has so many forms, the most beautiful thing is loving yourself"
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Ivory

"I'm so glad to see you again and most of all, I'm glad to see you doing better" Ms. Joyce said.

Joyce was a therapist but I prefer the term counselor. My dad truly was my best friend so after he died I pretty much confided in her. Not saying I couldn't talk to my mama or brothers but we all were affected by his death. A bunch of hurt people trying to help another hurt person is chaos waiting to happen.

"And how do you know I'm doing better" I tilted my head and smiled; she was right.

"Honey I know these things and not just because of my job but because of your beauty" she said confusing me.

As if Joyce could read through the puzzled look on my face she spoke further. "Just like I told you in the past, beauty is not only about looks. I know you're doing better because the first time you came in my office everything about you was so dull but now I can undoubtedly see the change. That glow on your face exudes self-confidence and self-love. This is a blessing"

"All I can say is positive self-talk and self-acceptance" I sighed gratefully.

"Believe me I know, now what brings you by here today" she asked.

"Nothing specific" I shook my head. "I'm at a positive place in my life and I feel like I need to thank the person that helped me get here"

"No need" she refused. "Have you reached out to your other family or vice versa"

"Honestly I haven't but I will eventually because I don't wanna live the rest of my life thinking about what if" I spoke.

What if everyone grew up and recognized their faults? What if we moved past our problems so we can have a nice family reunion? Or what if I said fuck them and continued doing me.

She nodded sensing I didn't wanna talk about it. "Ivana and Nick's anniversary is coming up" she said mentioning my mother and father.

"Yeah me and my siblings are actually planning something since this will be the 26th year" I smiled. "You're welcomed to come"

"That's nice but I don't want to impose on your family time just have Ivana give me a call" she said.

After talking with Joyce I left and was now on my way to my next destination which was Corey's house. I had a few things on my agenda today but I haven't seen her since Monday and today was Thursday.

Finally making it to her house, I knocked on the door and waited. I could've just used the key she gave me but last time I walked in on her about to get busy. Lesson learned.

"Why didn't you use the key or are you still traumatized from last time" Corey laughed as if it was the funniest thing ever. "You should've let me know you were coming"

"Don't blame it on me because you was being fast, I just wanted to be a good little sister and surprise you"

"Ivy sex is sex and I have needs so get over it" she playfully rolled her eyes.

"Yeah I know but almost seeing you in action" I shook my head.

She chuckled and pulled me all the way into the house. I didn't even notice we were still standing outside but that's just how things are with me and Corey. We could talk all day which sometimes was very relaxing especially when I needed to take my mind off something. Other times not really because I was probably being lectured.

"You looking all pretty, what you did today" Corey asked propping her feet up on the couch.

"Thank you thank you" I smiled. "And nothing really just been running around trying to get stuff together for mama's anniversary"

"And by that look on your face you ran out of ideas" she chuckled already knowing me. "How 'bout you do something small yet memorable" she suggested.

That did help me out a little bit because I was all over the place, didn't know if I wanted to do a big party or something simple.

"I also went to visit Joyce today- she mentioned my other family" I sighed.

Corey sat up attentively. "Well for mama's side of the family I don't think it should be that hard to build a relationship. I know they disowned her but parents make mistakes all the time. Not trying to justify the bullshit they pulled but they might regret it every day, you'll never know unless you take a chance"

I nodded in agreement, mama is their only child so I know they have to regret it especially after seeing how successful she was with raising 4 kids even though they doubted her.

Now with my dad's side it definitely would take more work, maybe even family counseling. It was some deeper issues occurring and we needed to find the root of the problem.

"By all means I'm not telling you what you should do because that's not my place, just think about the long term effects your decision will have" Corey said.

"Cheer up sis you know I love you" she nudged me.

"I don't say it often but I really do appreciate you Corey"

"I know baby sis, don't even worry about it"

Hours later...

"Milo is calling me, I'm not about to hear the end of it from him" I looked at my phone then answered it.

"Hey Milo" Corey smiled in the camera since it was a FaceTime call.

"Don't 'Hey Milo' me" he mocked her voice. "I called both of y'all only to get no answer and to find out y'all together, bitch I am hurt" he said or more like yelled into the phone.

"Sorry boo, be at my house in the next hour, we going to Times Square" Corey said.

"And y'all made plans without me, ain't that some shit" he mumbled before hanging up.

"Ain't nobody sweating Milo cause I already know he'll be knocking at my door in the next few minutes"

"I still can't get over the fact that y'all live 5 minutes away from each other" I laughed.

Originally they were supposed to move in together but whenever Corey is not helping me out at the studio she's at her other job and she wouldn't get no sleep whatsoever because Milo has a new man at his house every week.

"You could be living close to us too but I understand it's more convenient for you" she said. "And besides, you might be moving in with that new man of yours" she smirked.

"What new man" Milo walked in like he owned the place. "You finally letting somebody vacuum that dust between your legs" he smirked.

"I can't stand you" I laughed. "And she's talking about Nipsey's friend Dave, we met at the studio then a few days ago he came by to sign up his daughter in one of my classes. After that we went to get something to eat, nothing serious, Corey over exaggerating"

"Dave East? Oh honey you better hop on that before I do" Milo said.

"Whatever and I'm not hopping on nothing, I'm fine by myself, men come with problems"

"Not all, you just need to find the right man and it may take a while" Corey pointed out.

"Dave is 26 anyway" I shrugged not really knowing why we were discussing him.

"Girl that's only 7 and a half years difference don't play yourself" Milo waved me off.

"Age doesn't define love Ivy, you'll learn to stop running" Corey said.

Well until then I'll keep running because in my mind all men do come with problems.