It Was Only a Kiss; Boyf Riends

Clear Your Brain and Move Ahead

Jeremy's POV

It had been a week since I kissed Michael, and we hadn't talked about it since. It was a stupid choice. I've never had feelings for any guys, ever! But...that kiss....it just felt, right.

I stood in the hallway, my peers rushing to classes, some of them literally pushing me out of their way in pursuit of their friends. I stayed still, looking for a red hoodie.

"Michael!" I shouted when I saw him.

"Hey, what's up bro?"

"Can we talk?" I glanced around. No one was looking at us, but my nerves got the best of me. "Privately?"

"Sure, what's going on?" He followed me out behind the school.

"Michael...About last week, I don't know what I was thinking."

He looked down at his feet.

"And, I'm sorry if you thought that...if you thought that it meant something. I'm not gay, I-I like girls. Just girls. " My voice cracked as I spoke, and I flinched with every squeak.

Michael's POV

Jeremy had given me hope. That we could be more than just friends. That we could actually work out that way. That there even was a we.

"Whatever, Jeremy."

I didn't want to see him. I walked back into the crowded hallway, hoping to be drowned out by the movement of the people, but everyone was in their classrooms. At least I didn't have any classes with Jeremy.

I was taken aback. Did I really just say that about Jeremy? Jer, my best friend since I was five. It felt awful.

I trudged to history class. We read something about the Renaissance, and how the Nazis built Jamestown. Or something like that.

Upon hearing the loud ring of the bell, kids flew out of their seats to the door. I traveled with them, relaxing into the crowd. I pulled my headphones over my ears and hit "shuffle" on my playlist.

I hummed to myself, the words of Marley flooding my body, calming me down with their familiarity.

Jeremy's POV

I wanted to talk to Michael, to make things right, but by the time I made it outside, he was nowhere to be seen. I noticed Jake opening his car door in the parking lot.

"Jake" I called.

"Hey man!" He shouted, friendly.

I chuckled. It's hard to believe that before the SQUIP, I had barely talked to him. He came towards me, and we bro hugged, kind of awkwardly, but it didn't matter.

"Can I vent to you about something?"

"Okay." His smile was gone, and a look of question spread across his face. His confusion made sense. We were friends, but we had only had real conversations a few times.

"Can you drive me home? I walked with Michael today."

Michael.

I cringed as I said his name aloud.

But Jake waved his hand in front of my face.

"Earth to Jeremy? I'll drive you home."

"Great!" I exclaimed over enthusiastically.

We drove, the silence sitting comfortably between us.

Time Skip Brought to You by: The Awkwardness of Writing How People get out of a car

We sat on the floor of my room, cherry coke in our hands. It was the only soda my dad didn't like and wouldn't drink, so I had a ton of it. I looked at Jake and smiled internally. The SQUIP screwed up my life in many ways, but at least I had gained some friends along the hell ride.

"So what's up?"

"Promise you won't tell anyone?"

"I promise. What's wrong"

"Are you sure y—"

"Dude, just tell me!"

"I kissed Michael!" It came out fast, without thought.

"Wait, what? Michael Mell?"

"No, Jake, my other best friend Michael."

"Damn. Huh. I always knew Michael was gay. He is gay right?"

I hesitated. "Yeah. He is." It came out pretty weak.

"Sorry. Anyways, you kissed him? What's the big deal? You're single, you—"

"I'm straight."

Jake giggled. I don't know if I've ever heard Jake giggle before. Maybe if you tickled a pig you'd get a similar noise.

"What? Why are you laughing?" I felt anger rise to my face.

"I don't know. It isn't my place to say anything. Look, figuring out I was pan took time, so why don't you step back and just....figure it out. Whatever. I don't know. I don't wanna pressure you, but your sexuality is part of who you are."

Seeing Jake so serious made me nervous. But maybe he had a point. Maybe I wasn't straight?

I laughed and shook my head. Yeah right, Jeremy. Yeah right.

Word Count: 761