A day like another
Family meal
Smile is a requirement
To be presentable
"How are you Maya?"
"Fine! Everything's alright."
I'm not fucking okay. Everything is crashing down, collapsing, all under my feet. Everything is an endless falling, I don't see the end of it, but I'm already at the end of my tether.
"And school? How's it going?"
"It's quite good. Honestly, it's okay. It's better than I expected."
It's way worse than everything I could imagine. If only you knew how I really wasn't ready.
"Your timetable, your teachers, your grades?"
"On the whole, it's okay."
My timetable? I have no time for myself anymore. It starts so early, it ends so late. And like it wasn't enough, school follows me to my house like a curse, through this abomination called homework. Yes you would believe I'm making a fuss about it, but believe me, it's heavy to handle.
But what's heavier, is my teachers. I would really like to tell you how much I wanna kill them all. I would like to tell you what kind of pressure they throw on us like we're an army of Heracles. How I don't get anything, and it gets me.
And what about my grades? Some are okay, some are good, some are bad. Wanna know what's funny? They depends on how the teacher sees you, not on how you've worked. And I'm honestly sick of working my ass off to get an average grade. And being sick is the excuse I use to justify my plentiful absences.
And yet, I would like to tell you how I'm generally absent, mentally and emotionally.
Everything is just empty.
"And your love life, huh?"
"Nothing. As always"
Wow I didn't lie. It's the void, the black hole, I swear. I'm dying for someone to hug me when I'm cold, to wipe my tears, to tell me stupid jokes, to give me ridiculous nicknames. To just fill this empty space. This vast empty space. To be my everything.
If only I could tell you.
If only I had a reason to tell you.
If only I could even formulate sentences.
When you're made of emptiness, what can you even do?
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Started on November 4th 2018, 1:40am
Finished on November 4th 2018, 2:25am
Idk what to say about that poem.
Idk what to say anymore.
My aunt and my mother are drunk af lmao they're so loud I can't sleep bc of them. Wait, I can't sleep anyway.
Let's just post the French translation and read a book.
Wtf am I saying, I'm literally telling my life lmao.
Don't mind me, howls. Just mind my writings, it's all that matters.
Good night, M ღ
ESTÁS LEYENDO
Late nights | poetry
PoesíaLet the darkness overwhelm your being and your soul. Let it guide you into an intense and ardent imagination. Laisse l'obscurité envahir ton être et ton âme. Laisse la te guider au beau milieu d'une intense et ardente imagination. ------- Been #310...
