Chapter Ten

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R O S A L I N A

I lay awake in my bed because I'm unable to sleep. The thought of Monse and Cesar swimming around my head. I can't believe he had sex with Monse when we were seeing each other. Maybe he lied when he said he had feelings for me. How could I ever trust him after this? He's a liar and a cheater.

Seeing as I can't seem to sleep, I get out of bed and decide to go outside and sit on my porch steps. Nobody's home right now. My mom is working late per usual, and I don't even bother to care where Javier is. He'll come home whenever he wants to sleep. On my way out I check the time and it's about one in the morning. I've just been lying on my bed staring at the ceiling for the past two hours in the dark.

I quietly shut the door behind me and sit on the steps. The neighborhood is somewhat quiet for once. Sure there's the occasional yelling in someone's house but nothing new. As I'm sitting on the porch I notice this figure slightly staggering on the sidewalk a little ways from down the street. Probably just some guy walking home after a party or something.

I notice him look at my house and then he spots me. He takes off his hood but it's still too dark so that I can't see who it is. But then he turns and starts walking up my sidewalk. I get a little freaked out but I decide to see whoever it is. Hardly no one ever comes here. Sure it could be someone trying to kill me, but would that be the worst thing?

They get closer and I see that it's only Cesar. Just looking at him shoves knives through my chest. "What are you doing here? It's late," I say bluntly. I don't even care to fight him anymore. He'll find a way to talk to me one way or another. I might as well just get over with it now.

"Is your brother here?" he slurs a little. I laugh in amusement. I've never imagined Cesar as a guy to get drunk.

"Are you drunk, Cesar?" I ask.

"Only a little," he says. I really can't believe that Cesar is at my house at one in the morning drunk. I don't even know what to do right now. He doesn't seem in the condition to walk home. For Christ's sakes, he probably can't even remember where he lives!

I don't know whether or not to bring him inside or let him find his own way home. Sure he's a shitty person but I wouldn't wish actual harm upon someone. He could get lost or jumped or something like that if he tried to go home. I'm also not trying to walk him home.

"Come on," I sigh standing up. He looks at me confused and I roll my eyes. I grab his arm and pull him with me inside of my house.

"Is your brother here?" he asks.

"No ones home," I say shutting the door behind me. This is going to be one hell of a night I can already feel it.

"So we're alone?" he raises his eyebrow and smirks. He's really annoying when he's drunk.

"Don't get any bright ideas. I'm only letting you stay because you could get jumped or something walking home," I say. I lock the front door and walk to my room. Cesar follows behind me and I hear him hit the wall. I turn around and he's using it as support to hold himself up.

"Jesus, how much did you drink?" I ask him. I put his arm over me and my arm around him so that I'm supporting him. I walk him to my room and he falls flat on my bed. He kicks his shoes and pants off and puts the blankets over him.

"I guess I'm sleeping on the couch tonight," I sigh to myself. Seeing as he's taking up almost all of my bed and I'm really not trying to sleep next to him.

I go over and grab a pillow from next to him and he grabs my wrist. "Can you stay with me?" he asks. He sounds so innocent, it's almost odd. I really don't know if it's a good idea or if I even want to sleep next to him. After finding out about him and Monse, I don't know how to feel. "Please?"

Before I know it I find myself saying without hesitation, "Okay." I go and turn my bedroom light off and shut my door. I get on my bed and put the covers over me. I make sure there's a good distance between me and Cesar. That doesn't last long when he pulls me next to him. "Cesar," I say. He shushes me and puts his arm around me.

"It's been awhile since I've slept in your bed," he says.

"There was a reason for that, and now there's another one. This is just a pass because you're drunk and vulnerable," I say.

"I'm not vulnerable," he slurs.

"Oh you most definitely are," I laugh a little.

"I love your laugh," he says. I don't respond, what does someone even respond to that? Thank you? "I'm so fucking sorry Rosalina, I really am. For everything that I've ever put you through." I stay silent. "I've been a real shitty person the last few months. It's like I don't even know who I am anymore. Back then, I never would've done what I did to you to anybody. I don't know what came over me, but I see that now. I know that it's wrong and that's not how a guy should ever treat a girl ever. I had real feelings for you, I still do. I was just an idiot." A tear rolls down my cheek.

"I never should've cheated on you. I never should've messed with you or Monse's feelings. I never should've been mean to you. I'm sorry, really. I say that from the bottom of my heart," his voice cracks. I sit up as more tears start to fall down my face and I just breakdown. He sits up as well and puts his arms around me. He has such a way with words that I always somehow end up forgiving him for all of the shitty things he's done.

But after hearing that, it's different. It was real. As they say, drunk words are sober thoughts. Some people just need a little push to express their true selves and feelings. "I forgive you, but please, I beg you. Never do anything like that again. If there's anything else that you've done, you have to tell me now," I say looking at him.

"There is nothing else that I've done that you need to know about. Don't worry, I never plan on doing anything like that ever again in my whole life," he promises. I nod and lean in and kiss him. I can definitely taste the alcohol but I don't even care. He lays back and eventually I pull away. He wraps his arms around me and I lay my head on his chest.

"Now what was that about that you and Olivia kissed?" I ask him.

"Okay first of all, she kissed me first. I pulled away, I don't have feelings for her. I could never do that to Ruby anyway, he likes her too much. You don't need to worry about her," he says rubbing my arm.

"And Monse?" I ask. I feel him tense slightly.

"It's probably best if we just stayed best friends. If we were in a relationship, I think it would've affected our friendship with the guys," he says.

"But do you still like her?" I ask him. I can feel him hesitate before he says his answer.

"No."

"You're lying, Cesar. But I understand, it's okay. I know you're not going to get over her so fast, I mean it takes time to get over someone. Seeing as how I couldn't seem to get over you," I say.

"Thank you for understanding, but I'll get over it don't worry. And was that such a bad thing? Look at us now," he says. I can sense the smile on his face.

"I guess not. I'm tired now, goodnight Cesar," I say before shutting my eyes.

"Goodnight, Rosalina," he says kissing my head.

"You'll be the death of me, Cesar Diaz," I say before falling asleep.

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