Gemini

The Swap

"I'm not going to swap places with you." I tell my brother for the millionth time today.

"Please Kong! They won't even know. That's the beauty of it." Singto pleads for his millionth time as well. 

He doesn't give up easily and I know he's hoping to wear me down. How do I know this? Because it's what he always does and sadly, I always give in eventually. It hard to say no to a twin that knows all your weaknesses and knows how to manipulate them to their advantage.

"Why should I? I'm not even in that faculty."

"If I don't show, everyone will be punished because of it." pouts Singto. I roll my eyes - like he really cares about his classmates so much. If he had then he wouldn't have gotten himself into this dilemma in the first place.

"I have my own hazing to attend Sing. I can't be in two places at once." 

"I've seen your so-called hazing and it's nothing compared to how harsh the Engineering's is! You can miss it and they won't even care."

"Maybe but I'm not the one who told off the head hazer my first day either."

Sing groans, no doubt remembering that particular incident, "Why do you have to bring that up? I'm perfectly happy pretending it never happened."

I glare at my brother - he knows exactly why I bring it up. He wouldn't be in such a tight spot if he had kept his head down but no, Sing does his own thing, even if creates messes that others - mainly me - have to clean up.

Case in point - Sing has once again made a promise that he can't keep and expects me to help him out. What promise you ask? To tutor some classmate with their math homework and while I'm sure that sounds altruistic and all, trust me, it's not. No doubt it's a classmate that just so happens to be a pretty girl that he's been wanting to score a date with but hasn't had the time. Don't get me wrong, my brother is smart and math is one of his best subjects but he's also a bit of a player.

Anyways, this time I'm determined to say no to my brother. I will be strong and not give in.

I will- oh fuck.

He's got sad puppy eyes.

Shaking my head emphatically, I close my eyes against it. You'd think that looking at someone that shares the same face would make me immune to such tricks but it doesn't. To be honest, it's worse because not only are you looking at your twin looking sad, but yourself as well. It's a double mind-fuck.

Keeping my eyes closed - as silly as it my seem - is my best defense against such a dirty underhanded tactic. "No Sing. You dug your own grave, now you get to lie in it. So grab a pillow and get comfortable."

"But you haven't even heard the best part of it yet Kong." whined my twin.

"I'm all ears brother." Just not all eyes because dumb I am not.

"My head hazer is P'Arthit."

Against my better judgement, my eyes snap open in surprise.

And that's how I found myself agreeing to pretend to be my brother Sing at the Engineer hazing for the following Monday when I actually am studying at the Faculty of Economics. Good times.

I'd like to pretend that I don't know how I got myself into this but I do. All it took was a single name and I was done for. I succumbed quicker than a virgin boy on prom night.

P'Arthit.

He is both the bane of my existence as well as my salvation.

I've known him most of my life but I existed on the fringes of his life. I was more of a casual observer than an active participant. I would have thought he didn't know I was alive except for the event that basically started my obsession with him in the first place.

Did I mention that he was my first kiss?

Yup. That's right. P'Arthit and I shared our first kiss when we were kids. I was 10 years old and he was 12 at the time. I'm sure it seems like it must have been an accident but it wasn't. It most definitely wasn't.

We grew up in the same neighborhood since we were little and there was a group of us that all played together. Singto and I played with them all the time but P'Arthit never really spoke to me. My brother, he talked to constantly, but not to me. So yes, technically he knew I was alive but I figured he must hate me if he would only talk to one of us.

Granted Singto was always the carefree, outgoing one while I tended to downplay my personality around him so I came across as the "sweet, innocent one". So it did make sense that our friends gravitated to my twin, which was fine with me - most of the time. I mean, generally I preferred to be left alone to study and read unless P'Arthit was around, then I miraculously was free to play with our friends.

To be honest, my twin and I were not one specific set of traits, it just depended on whom we were with at the time. We could actually perfectly imitate the other because of that reason. All of our friends were fooled by us every single time when we switched but not P'Arthit. Somehow, he always knew which one of us was which. That's why I was sure he hated me.

Until the day that he kissed me.

Now the entire time that we spent together as kids, I had a hopeless crush on the older boy. There were no girls that I liked. There were no boys that I liked. There was only P'Arthit.

He was so cute to me with his constant grumpiness and Pink Milk obsession. How someone could drink something so sugary sweet, and yet have their personality be the complete opposite, was something of an amusement to me. 

So when he wouldn't speak to me, it crushed me. Day in and day out. I thought my heart would never heal. When our parents announced that we would be moving the summer after we turned 10, I was both relieved and distraught.

When we told our neighborhood friends, they were sad to see us go but P'Arthit didn't say anything at all, he just left and went home after out announcement. In fact, we didn't see him for several days until the day before we were to move. Everything had been packed and loaded up onto the moving truck so our home was feeling rather empty. We went to hang out at a friend's house next door and everyone came over, including the elusive P'Arthit.

It was late in the evening and everyone decided to play a game of hide n' seek one last time. We'd use a one block radius to hide and if caught, you had to go to jail until you were rescued. This was a favorite of ours and we were happy to have one more chance to play. All the neighbors knew we played in their yards and were fine with it as long as we were respectful, which we always were. One of the boys, Tanet, was the designated 'It' and soon, everyone spread out to their individual hiding spots.

As I was hiding in one of the many crevices I have found over the years, I was startled when someone slid up next to me. I almost let out a yelp when my mouth was covered and I saw that it was P'Arthit. He held up his index finger to his mouth, signaling me to be quiet before removing his hand that had silenced me.

This was the first time I could ever remember him voluntarily seeking me out and he was choosing to do so the night before I was leaving. It was enough to make me want to cry. 

"P'?" I whispered, confused.

The next thing I knew, he leaned over and pressed his lips against mine. I was shocked. He basically ignored me for years and then suddenly he was kissing me! It was just an innocent peck of the lips but it changed everything for me.

When he drew back, I think he was going to say something but before he could, we were caught by Tanet. Thankfully he didn't see anything but the moment for speaking had passed, as shortly after, the game was over and it was time to go home. 

I never got a chance to find out his reason for kissing me that night and it's bothered me for years. He completely destroyed any chance I might have had to get over him with that single touch of his lips.

And now I finally have a chance to get some answers thanks to my brother. I will play the part of my twin and see P'Arthit once more.

Let's see if he can still tell me apart from Sing.

♊ ~ ♊ ~ ♊